Serve Returned

For the life of me, I struggle to comprehend why it is that I am often accused of bringing myself up at the expense of lowering others. Given how high my self-esteem usually is, I see no reason why I would ever need to engage in such behavior. Being an introvert, I see little, if any, value in relying or even using other people to bring my spirits up.  Whether I portray others in a proverbial negative light, this has zero effect as to how I feel about myself. If you’ve done something wrong or questionable, whatever it is you have done will not affect my self-esteem whatsoever.

Don’t think for a second that whatever simplicities you utter are somehow so profound. When you say that all you can do is control the way in which you react to things, you are merely stating the obvious. It’s like saying that in order to live, we must breathe in oxygen. 

Making up realities, in and of itself, makes no sense. That’s about as silly as the phrase, “my truth”. There is no “your truth” or “my truth”. There is just THE truth. 

Don’t try to get all philosophical and preach that life is too short for this, or life is too short for that. Whether you proclaim it, we all know that time and life are precious.  Facts are facts.  Lies are lies.  If we’re playing this game, let’s throw some algebra into the mix and say that x = x.  Hell, even y = y. 

Contrary to your belief, you clearly do have the time and energy for the bullshit because you took the time to write the entry that you wrote.  You keep telling yourself that you’re a good person.  Maybe the repetition will make it the reality that you want it to be?  If you were truly a good person, you wouldn’t have to repeat it over and over and over again.  Additionally, the same goes for you, for whatever the reason, feeling compelled to declare that your life is interesting.  If it was, you wouldn’t have to say it or repeat it constantly.  You would just let it be.      

None of this is the mind game that you perceive it to be, though for whatever the reason, you are playing some kind of game.  It’s not worth the effort to decipher what exactly that game is though.

You can make whatever change you feel is necessary.  It is also interesting that you, in your entry anyway, appear to refer to yourself as a “bitch”, as you assert that a bitch can only handle so much.  I don’t know if that is somehow demeaning or possibly empowering for you.