Conference calls, kids, and an asshole boss

Like many other working parents, I have been juggling a lot of responsibilities due to the COVID-19 outbreak. I am working from home, home schooling my 3 school aged children, and caring for my infant son. While some people are struggling with unemployment and others are lucky to have jobs that are giving them paid time off, I am stuck in the middle with the fortune of being an essential employee and disadvantage of having home bound children. I work most closely with 2 male coworkers who do not have children, so I am no stranger to working twice as hard and twice as long to accomplish the same tasks as my office companions. Nonetheless, this multitasking experience is getting the best of me. While my coworkers are usually supportive to the best of their abilities with the limited understanding they have of the walk in my shoes, they occasionally make my life very difficult as a working mom. Because my husband cannot understand the struggle I am enduring either, I decided to create this blog to get my frustration out and maybe even reach someone out there in the sea of people who can relate. Today, I was on a conference call with my boss and everyone who works in my region — so, a lot of people. During this call, my boss called on me to answer a question and I had to ask him to repeat himself since I couldn’t hear him over my baby squealing. I apologized and explained that I was alone with the baby today, while my baby continued to scream in the background. I did my best to answer the question and then muted myself, assuming my boss would understand that I could listen but that I would not be able to join in the conversation. I expected everyone would understand, as many of the other employees are also working from home with children who are out of school and day care. Instead, my boss called on me twice more with questions while I was changing a diaper and when I was trying to calm my very upset baby who just wanted me to give him my attention. I was unable to hear anyone through my baby’s screams and it was very disruptive to everyone else on the call to hear all the noise as well. It was embarrassing to say the least. To add insult to injury, my boss asked me to stay on the call after everyone else got off to have a talk, letting everyone else know that I was about to be reprimanded for having to take care of my baby during the call. My boss then told me after everyone else dropped off the call that “everyone else” was still able to handle the same workload as they did when they were working in the office before the COVID-19 restrictions and that if I was having childcare “issues” that I needed to make a daily list of all the things I could not do because someone else would have to do them. This, of course, made me feel like I am a burden to the whole team because I am a mom and don’t have anyone to watch my kids right now. I replied that if everyone else with kids has someone to watch their kids full time right now, that is great for them, but I do not have that luxury. I was pissed. He then proceeded to tell me that I need to manage the people under me better and make sure they are doing what they are supposed to be doing because if they won’t there is a long line at the unemployment office full of people who need a job right now. This damn well seemed like an implied threat to me. I know that I cannot be legally fired for having kids or for being unavailable during this time because my kids are out of school and day care, but that does not make this situation any less infuriating. That’s about it for now. Just a tired pissed off mom who needed to vent and now I am going to eat this delicious meal I made and zone out with Netflix and try to forget this day happened.

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April 1, 2020

Wow, I feel for you.  Your boss was being unreasonable and flat out an ass. I am childless and can’t relate to the daily struggles during a good time let alone now, but still I would have been sympathetic.  Hang in there and vent often.  Here to listen.

April 1, 2020

What a dick boss you have. It’s truly unempathetic during a difficult time. I’m sorry you have to deal with that!

April 1, 2020

Saying that “everyone else” is able to handle it is really bad management – first of all, that’s totally not true, and second you are doing the best you can. Hope it gets better for you!

Welcome to Open Diary 🙂

April 1, 2020

Thank you all for your supportive comments. It really helps to hear that right now! Today was not any better, but I am pushing through it determined not to let this defeat me.