Just a day

Second day of spring break and I stayed up so late that I am exhausted like a kid.

And then, I failed as an adult – I discovered cinnamon rolls in my fridge… At no point in time should cinnamon rolls be an entire meal, let alone two. But that has made me hate the sun a bit less today.

Why did I stay up so late? I forgot to turn off notifications on my phone, and it made a sound as I was going under – and I received a text from a former student via Facebook Messanger at 1 am. My brain went “Is *** okay?!?!?” And I opened the message to see pictures. My ‘kid’ had just gotten a new tattoo, and wants me to see it because “[I] was the only person to support his art when he was here.” And why was he texting me at 1 am? He is currently stationed in Japan with the military and forgot about the time difference.

I stayed up texting him for about an hour, talking about art and tattoos, and the taboo nature of tattoos in Japanese culture. He was just so excited, and he wanted me to be “the first of his family to share this with.” Of course, I had to stay up talking with him. When I told him I needed to get some sleep, he said the same thing as he had fire watch and would be up all night.

He signed off with “Love you” – which would probably make most people twitchy. But I understand what he meant. Back in November when he visited before being shipped out and stopped by to visit me. We had a lovely chat, and I remember him starting off with “This sounds creepy, but I promise it’s not” – and he explained that I was family to him and that he loved me as family, and that even though he was an adult, that it meant a lot that I still called him “one of my kids.” Then he gave me his current unit “challenge coin” – these are medallions/coins that are given to service members, usually to prove membership of a specific battalion “when challenged.” He gave his battalion coin to me; something that is usually kept, or given to a family member or significant other, he gave to me because he said I helped him, not only as his teacher but because it was always clear that I simply cared about him for who he was. I stood there crying as this HUGE ‘kid’ just about broke my ribs in a bear hug, thanking me for always believing in him, even when he didn’t.

Teachers aren’t supposed to have favorites, but there are just some kids we get along with in different ways. He was the only boy in the house, two sisters, including his twin, and a very strong mom, who I still think is an amazing woman. But he never had anything that was “his” except books and art, which his family “didn’t get,” but then he would come to school early to share his sketchbook with me, to talk about SciFi and Fantasy books, and video games. In his class I had “my boys” who would come in early every day to be happy Geeks with me – they tried to teach me about sports, and I gave them pointers on various video game levels and book recommendations. He came in every day, even when he was sick, just to talk with me.

I grew up with my brother, was so used to the role of “big sister,” that I fall into the role so easily. I tend to fill that more as a teacher than the “I’m an adult who cares” part. And I think that is what my kids need sometimes.

“My boys” graduated a while ago, are graduating college now and moving on to careers, damn, all of them can go to bars and have been able to do so for years…

Well, what am I doing with my lazy spring break day? Cleaning. Cleaning my space, and my digital life as well. We’ll see how that goes.