A little lost..

I don’t think I have ever said the truth on how I feel, not to somebody’s face. My journal entry’s are generally personal, intimate and me talking to me..

I think I am writing on here for some kind of response, some re assurance, some guidance. Things are hard. I have lost everything I care about in a matter of weeks and I’m not sure if it’s me or not.. I don’t know why I am so prone to loosing everything that’s good in my life or why I constantly feel like I am failing. Half the time I question why I am here at all.. That’s the truth.

The world is a big place yet I feel like the four walls closing in around me are designed to make me fail. Designed to make me feel there is nothing outside of it. My life feels like a world of emptiness and I’m so sad I don’t even know how to cry anymore. I’m sad, but I am so so numb. I just want to be me again, free. I want to be able to laugh with people I care about and feel welcomed. Everyday starts with hope, but ends with sadness.

Maybe tomorrow..

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March 30, 2021

You aren’t alone. I’m a friendly ear. hugs

April 6, 2021

*big hugs* I, also, sometimes feel like I’ve lost everything, but you need to know you’re not alone. Even if everyone else abandons you, the people here are awesome, and I’m willing to listen, too.

May 25, 2021

*hugs*

September 2, 2021

I am an infrequent reader, but I know that you are loved. Please do not give up!