My sadistic life

Dear someone,

I dont know who you are and what are you thinking right know…. honestly i dont really know why I am doing this… writing what’s inside my head…. maybe I am doing this because I am so fed up with the real life that I need something as my escape…. maybe because I am too tired of being judged or being perfect.

well my name is let’s just say star and I am a shattered soul that has no one to talk to or someone to trust… I am a lonely person… this doesn’t mean I sit alone in the corner at class and mourn about my life.. no, i am so popular to the point where i am surrounded with so much friends but none of them are trustworthy … I dont know if you know the feeling where you are surrounded with life but yet you still feel dead… you know when you are so judged that everyone focus on what they say about you and what you do that they dont see that you are never perfect or never will be but the reality is that from inside you are nothing but pieces of shattered glass…

The pressure you get from those around you .. that everyone expects the best from you… that if you do one imperfect thing they make you feel disgraced and they make you become guilty for never being the best.

I think i am doing this to rant and actually have someone to talk to even though i dont know who are they…. i think i am doing this to stay away from my depressed life that i no longer could keep up with.

you know they always say  the saddest people smile the brightest …. well this me and welcome to my fucked up life

I dont know who you are but all i know you can be someone that actually never judges me and see what i see.

Log in to write a note
November 18, 2019

Hello and welcome to Open Diary! I hope that you can find people to talk to here – there is so much pressure in life, put on us by others and also put on us by ourselves. I hope writing it out can help you find some relief 🙂

November 18, 2019


I’m Anonymously Honest. I literally just signed up to Open Diary. You’re entry is the first entry that I’ve read. In a way it was kind of like a sigh of relief when I read it. Just knowing that someone out there kind of feels the way  I do and I’m not alone. I relate to you in a way, and it’s a good sad feeling.  I have yet to make my entry but I’m about to. Maybe, someone out there can relate to it/my feelings and feel the way I did after I read your entry. Relief.


November 18, 2019

@anonymouslyhonest Hey,

I am glad a small thing like this made you feel relieved… and so you know you are not alone as you said we relate and its kinda sad but its sadness that brings you peace i guess.. I am new too and if you need somebody to talk to anonymously i would be more then glad to be there… and you know sometimes in life we should talk about things and dont keep them bottled up

November 18, 2019


I agree 100% and thanks the same goes to you if you need or want someone to talk to, I’m here. I look forward to seeing your future entry’s.


November 18, 2019

I refer to myself as “a bag of shattered glass” so you caught my attention. Welcome to OD.