College/School Life

I wish there were more scholarships I could apply for, this paying out of pocket for school stuff really sucks! The only real place I have gone for scholarships is Niche and I never seem to get them. The school doesn’t have anything available right now either so that really sucks as well so I will keep doing it the way I have been… Pay as I go and see what happens. Right now I have to make 2 big payments towards the school and made another small one today. I’m going to wait as long as I can and see if any of the 3 scholarships I applied for actually go through but I don’t know how legit that site is. I wish there was a GOOD site for Military Spouses of Veterans to get Scholarships. I won’t do another semester if stuff comes up and I can’t do it because I don’t want to put us in anymore debt, I am trying to keep that as low as possible, I have a good GPA right now though and I would LOVE to finish school and get that accomplishment under my belt even though it’s not a big degree it’s better than nothing (Accociate Of Arts is what I am going for) I have friends who are still in school and they have come so far and are doing great things with their degrees and I want that. What stinks is that around here there is not much in the way of jobs but I was looking at something maybe in Business or Legal but I will probably do something in Business just not sure what that will be yet but I know that with that I will be able to advance at my current company I am at now. I just thought that maybe with my background of all the things I had to deal with since childhood and even as an adult dealing with family members breaking the law (drugs) that maybe something in Legal might be good for me but then again maybe not because it would hit too close to home. I’m going to take a career planning class to help me figure things out. I need 40 MNTC classes and if I stick with the classes I am signed up for right now it means I am almost halfway done with having those completed and with my AA degree I need 60 credits and if I stick with what I am signed up for right now I am a little over halfway done. I will need 25 MNTC classes and 39 for my degree which seems like a lot sometimes when I really think about it but other times not so much. I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up 😉  and now I think I have more of an idea… I never tried because school is so expensive and I had my mind on other things but now I’m really going to try and no one knows that I am doing this… just my husband and my 2 best friends because if I decide not to keep going it won’t be such a big deal. I did take a break from when I started and now I just hope to take summers off since that’s when we usually go on vacation. I’m trying to make it so we can still do the things we want to do, it’s a process but I know that God’s got this and we will be taken care of no matter what the outcome is.

It will be difficult to juggle the Wife, Mom, full time job, school life and right now I am signed up for 4 classes where as when I signed up in Spring 2017 I took 2 classes and then Spring 2018 I only took one class and that one class in Spring 2018 only lasted around 8 weeks or so and it wasn’t a tough class at all but a required one so I took it. I told my daughter that she needs to start helping with more things around the house now so that she is used to it when I start school because I know I will be busier so we will both need to juggle school but I have a little more to juggle than she will. My husband has been supportive through this whole school thing and told me that if this is something I want to do then keep going with it. Sometimes I still go back and forth and other times I see how well other people are doing and how far they are going with their schooling it makes me want to do that too. (I have an old friend from AZ who is almost done with her Masters in accounting, at least I think that is what she said and where she is at because she said something about possibly taking a break and going for her doctorate after that) If I could just go even for my Bachelors in Business of some sort that would be amazing but little steps at a time 🙂  sometimes I think that maybe I don’t need to go that far in school because maybe if I stick with my company long enough I can just advance without a degree but other times I feel like I need to have something to fall back on. I would LOVE to get this done and over with and feel good but with taking this many classes and never having done it before I don’t want it to mess up my GPA because I would REALLY  LOVE to graduate with honors, I should see what my GPA needs to be at to qualify so I know but even so not knowing may make me work harder and push myself. I like to do well in school.

Ugh I should have went for a run today I was stress eating today and feel gross and I didn’t run yesterday either. I REALLY need to get back into it cause I feel SO GROSS and I feel like I look Gross. My stupid Fitbit watch band keeps coming off every time I take the watch off to shower, I will eventually need another one of those too but it’s not priority. House Stuff (Fixings) Vacations, and schooling is what I am trying to focus on and less of that material crap!

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