The trek continues …

… into living without a job.  There are days when it feels like I should be doing more with my time, and then there are days when it totally doesn’t bother me if I don’t even get the dishes done.  Indulging in reading has become a part of my days lately and it struck me that I consider reading to be an indulgence.  When I look up the word it seems I indulge in a lot of things every day … “to yield to an inclination or desire; to satisfy or gratify; to allow (oneself) to follow one’s will”.  Interesting really that going by definition, I indulge in life and by doing so, life indulges in me.  I’m grateful everyday for this reprieve from working.  However, this caused me to consider as well that indulging makes me feel like I’m doing something “wrong” … that I shouldn’t be doing whatever it is I’m indulging in … aka reading … really?? I wonder where I picked up that little lie?  So upon further analysis, I realized it’s not the reading itself I consider to be wrong, it’s that lack of “doing”; it’s the absence of not having “something to show” for my time; Gasp!!!! It’s maybe even feeling guilty that I’m not working right now, and actually indulging in “giving time” to reading (and another Gasp!!!) Fiction!! 😮  I’m giving my self a break from not only working at a job, but also working at a life.  I thoroughly enjoy the journey of self-discovery, but there is definitely something to be said about taking a holiday from that too, although I will admit that even reading this story has given me thoughts and ideas for when I return to my journey;)

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March 4, 2020

I think the big thing with indulgences is that it’s all about attitude. It’s only an indulgence as long as you think of it and treat it as one. I don’t know. I’m half awake. I need to come back and read this again when I’m more awake. I dunno. I think we can sometimes think of an indulgence as bad or negative, as if you didn’t be doing it. Why is reading a boring manual for a job a good thing, yet reading a good book for fun isn’t? You get so many more positives from reading the interesting book than the boring manual. I dunno. I don’t know what I’m talking about.

March 5, 2020

@heffay

Nah, you’re making perfect half-awake sense H!!  It’s true about attitude and how we look at something as to whether we consider it positive or negative.  I always considered an indulgence to be like a “guilty pleasure” (like eating ice cream for breakfast;), but the definition of the word isn’t negative at all, soooo yesterday I indulged even more into reading this very well-written novel that has captivated my attention, and I will continue indulging until the last word.

March 4, 2020

They say reading is good for the brain because it keeps you and your thoughts active and it’s an escape from real life…Enjoy the books and “indulge” yourself even more…..

March 5, 2020

@jaythesmartone

I hear you J:)  I do read lots of non-fiction, but sometimes my brain gets tired of information.  This reading holiday into a fictional novel is just as stimulating for my brain, but on a different level.  I AM escaping from real life into the life of this book … even took bits of it into my dreams last night.

March 4, 2020

This is a feeling that gets me (and other people too I bet) – that if you are doing something enjoyable or relaxing, you should feel guilty about not getting “important” things done. Not a good thing!

March 5, 2020

@thediarymaster

Totally agree DM!  How did the term “guilty pleasure” ever come into existence anyway??  I’m just about over feeling guilty for spending hours reading, and it’s been a good lesson for me to indulge more in other activities that I find pleasure in, but consider to be less important than say, doing the dishes LOL

March 5, 2020

@teamarea that’s important for all of us, I think! I’m trying to read more, and books that are pleasure, not “business”.