Four jobs…one is fake.

People don’t leave bad jobs… they leave bad bosses.

Hear well, ye who have eyes, for thine clves are amid!

Job A: horse-stable mucker. Official title, Yearling Equine Stablehand. I cleaned 30 stables a day; ultimate weight-loss routine! It sounds easy (beh, she’s just cleaning horse poop), but it’s definitely not scooping and cleaning the litter box! Bonus? Part of my actual job was to ride 🙂 (I also got to groom, bathe and train young horses).  I left because it paid poop.

Job B: script and subtitle translator – official title, Translation Register Update Editor. I get to familiarize myself with different cultures, languages, and I watch movies before they come out, to supervise the accuracy of dubbed or subtitled versions. Bonus? I’ve become an expert at how to curse in a ton of languages. I have not left – I do it on my time off.

Job C: FBI linguist – official title, Forensic Analysis Key-records Examiner. I translated documents & recordings having to do w/counterintelligence, threats & cybercrime. Fun but stressful. You sign NDAs prior to working, & the background check is no joke. Bonus? 10-12 hour days, 3 days a week, so, lots of free time 🙂 I left because it was a contract position.

Job D: Paralegal! Official title, Framework And Contracts Tracker. I did the same thing as a junior attorney, w/contracts only: I drafted & negotiated contracts, ensured signatures, & prepared stuff needed for government litigation & entertainment shoots. Bonus? Met celebs! I left for a better opportunity as something else cited in this entry 😀

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April 10, 2020

Job c fake one?

April 19, 2020

@kaliko – Indeed  😉  Not completely fake but one I don’t do all the time, so I used that one as the fake one.

April 11, 2020

FBI linguist?

April 12, 2020


A friend of mine does Job A on the side to be able to ride the horses. It’s definitely not easy, but it’s a dream job if you love horses.

April 15, 2020

@queenofegypt – It really is a dream job! I love horses. Ride since I was 3. I work now for some private clients for whom I sit on the weekends or on assignment – they pay me but that’s an added boon 🙂

April 15, 2020

@thenerve It just seemed the least plausible. But! That’s not saying it couldn’t be true!

April 19, 2020

@queenofegypt – That’s the one. Not actually completely fake but I used it as such because I don’t do it often.

April 15, 2020

@chattykat, @littleavocado, @queenofegypt, what made y’all guess C?

April 15, 2020

@thenerve FBI linguist is a heavy job where you have to be highly skilled, not that you aren’t.. C is farfetched.

April 19, 2020

@littleavocado – Well, let’s see, do 25+ years as an actual linguist in over 30 industries, count as “highly skilled” for you?  🙂  Why far-fetched, because we’re used to the TV’s idea of the FBI (and I assure you, it’s nothing at all like it)? While I DID use this one as a “fake”, I did so because I am not an *employee* of the FBI, but I do contract linguistic work for them.  I was hoping you guys would be able to tell me if you found the clues I hid in each position that told you which one was fake and which where not 😀

April 19, 2020

@thenerve You hid them well my dear.

April 15, 2020

And don’t leave us hanging! I’m dying to know the answer over here.

April 19, 2020

@queenofegypt – You got it right 🙂  It’s not completely fake because I do contract work for them once in a while, but I am not an employee, just an independent contractor).

April 18, 2020

I’m going to assume that you were never an FBI linguist, although you have mentioned that being a linguist would be your dream job.

April 19, 2020

@justamillennial – It *has* been my dream job for the past 25 years 🙂  but you got it right 🙂  It’s not totally fake (I do contract work for them, but I am just an independent contractor).

May 5, 2020

I read your notes, so I know C is the fake one, but it’s absolutely fascinating too.  If I had read about your background, as noted to littleavocado,  I would have definitely included C as one of your “real” jobs.  All of your jobs are very interesting.