#1: The words I couldn’t tell you

Hello my love of my life,

I am currently in the office, trying to kill sometime before I clock out from work. You’re occupying my mind most of the time and I cannot find the words to tell you how sorry I am for dragging you to this bullshit life of mine. This isn’t me, I used to be so optimistic in life, like I CAN DO EVERYTHING, I CAN HANDLE ANYTHING that life has thrown at me. I always believe that whenever I encounter challenges in my life, it’s testing my faith. But there’s another thing that I am being tested for,  my relationship with you. I wanna break up with you because your so kind and doesn’t deserve to carry the problems I had right now. You always tell me that we face this together but the guilt I felt whenever I hear you sigh deep and look for nothingness kills me. It kills me every time. I want to let you go but damn! God knows how much I love you.

I just hope, I can find a shortcut to solve this problem. I want our old selves back.