::sighs:: X Factor…

Today I sent Byron the song by Lauryn Hill ex-factor… I think it suits how I feel on our relationship rather well. I feel trapped by him, like my emotions he controls. He knows how to hurt me, how to make me feel guilty, make me happy.

He knows exactly what buttons to push, and he pushed them well yesterday. The one that got to me most was he knew how to make me feel insecure about Joey. He mentioned he talked to Joey the night before when I posted my last entries. He wouldnt tell me anything except that Joey looked up to him, or respected him or something like that. Took my insecure nature on high gear…. Of course the first thing I did say to Joey was “We need to talk”. Of course as I said that Joey told me he talked to Byron… ::laughs:: Took that insecurity right out from under me… Joey didnt even know it either. Honesty… I way like honesty in a relationship and Joey seems to understand this.

Ok back to the song I sent Byron, it so fits how I feel about it all. His ability to pull at my heart and my feelings. I dont even know what Im trying to say here.. Just that Ive never let someone know me like Byron got too, and now I fear not letting it all go…

God just like the song…