broken slinky

 

 aw man, now i feel crumby.

My back is aching and the pain is throbbing up through my shoulders.

it feels like i need to stretch, do some yoga or something.

I ate a delicious lunchw ith delicious melted cheese, but now i feel bloated and terrible.

i feel like my desk chair is making my back go out of wack.

my nose feels full of boogars, it’s hard to breathe.

I have an ache in my right leg, and it won’t go away.

i’m fucking old and I hate it! hate hate hate it!

i wish i had some lettuce. then i could make a salad.

omg, i think i have to poop.

i know you care.

but i also care.

i don’t want to poop at work! pooping at work is gross and people don’t need to be privy to my bowels!

I should totally delete that last sentence.

I shall cross it out with a line.

i think i read all my favorites.

crap.

guess i’ll have to work.

what the hell is up with tiger woods.

I knew he was screwy.

get it.

SCREWY!!!

lol.

oh i kill me

So I decided to look up some desk stretches and after 3 webpages (including one with some yoga technique involved) I feel 50% better! I am just so tensed out today! I’m not even sure why!

I should do these more often, especially for my neck and lower back. it feels awesome to stretch them out.

stupid broken slinky body!!!

That’s what I feel like.

A broken slinky.

you know, when they get all twisted out of shape and then tangled up in a giant mess?

that’s my dumb body right now!

I’ll never smoothly flop down the stairs feeling like this!!!!!

So I found the flaw in my dumb iphone! apple doesn’t support the flash player stuff, so that’s the only reason I can’t do my stupid applications on it. stupid iphone. I could smack you!!!

but I still love you baby. I still love you *smooch*

oh man, i’m bored as fuck on a log with acne and bacon grease.

serious.

BORED.

but i’ll go do my stupid work. Even though I’m doing it in advance and I can’t even finish the process until next week. The entire thing will just be ready to send by the end of the day.

and when will the end come?

in about 2 hours.

I think if I finish this malarky soon, I’ll work on a story.

would that make the children happy?

*children: YEEEESSSS

Ok children, just for you.

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i LOVE pooping at work. i try to time it up so i poop here every day. why? because i love the idea of getting paid to poop!

December 8, 2009

I love making my own salads. yummy!

If you gotta poop, you gotta poop….

December 8, 2009
December 8, 2009

I always say what Hoops says… I’d like to figure how much I’ve been paid to poop over the years… 🙂

December 8, 2009

Broken slinky is a good way to put it and I feel the exact same way. Ugh!

December 8, 2009

As far as I’m concerned, using bathrooms at work is one of the biggest drawbacks of being an employee vs. being self employed or working from home @@ Broken slinkies…I’ve seen many of those tangled disasters. Impossible to fix, too.

December 8, 2009

Yeah. Some days, I feel like I’m getting up there too. But yet, also some other days youngness combined in between. It’s weird. And, I don’t know what’s on the go with Tiger Woods, but I wish they’d FUCK OFF already! It’s HONESTLY starting to make me think that they have nothing better to do!

December 8, 2009

I always felt funny pooping at work…Though I love [hoops]idea of getting paid to poop.

December 8, 2009

I agree pooping at work is gross. Especially when you walk into the bathroom and someone neglected to do the courtesy flush.

Dude….my friends used to PAY ME TO UNTANGLE THEIR SLINKIES! How messed up is that?!

December 9, 2009

Ew I hate pooping in a public bathroom… And I hate when people poop when I’m in there too! Grody.

December 12, 2009

YAY it’s BLUE!!!!! Also, the begining of this entry reminds me of the poem “Sick” by Shel Silverstein…

December 12, 2009

“I cannot go to school today,” Said little Peggy Ann McKay. “I have the measles and the mumps, A gash, a rash and purple bumps. My mouth is wet, my throat is dry, I’m going blind in my right eye. My tonsils are as big as rocks, I’ve counted sixteen chicken pox And there’s one more–that’s seventeen, And don’t you think my face looks green? My leg is cut–myeyes are blue– It might be instamatic flu. I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke, I’m sure that my left leg is broke– My hip hurts when I move my chin, My belly button’s caving in, My back is wrenched, my ankle’s sprained, My ‘pendix pains each time it rains. My nose is cold, my toes are numb. I have a sliver in my thumb. My neck is stiff, my voice is weak, I hardly whisper when I speak. My tongue is filling up my mouth, I think my hair is falling out. My elbow’s bent, my spine ain’t straight, My temperature is one-o-eight. My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear, There is a hole inside my ear. I have a hangnail, and my heart is–what? What’s that? What’s that you say? You say today is. . .Saturday? G’bye, I’m

December 12, 2009

G’bye, I’m going out to play!”