Exodus

For something less depressing go one entry back.

You can love so many people in so many different ways. You can keep these as secrets all to yourself, fragmented in a thousand different memories tinted with summer sunbeams and the smell of the night, walking on clouds while coming home at 4AM.
The glove compartment isn’t accurately named and everybody knows it. So I’m proposing a swift orderly change.
Truth be told, I don’t really know what the hell I’m talking about anymore. In an attempt to forget that tonight ever happened I took way too many sleeping pills and now I’m just kind of jittery because it’s right before they hit and I’m anticipating what will be happening soon. My brain checked out about two hours ago.
Cause behind its door there’s nothing to keep my fingers warm and all I find are souvenirs from better times. Before the gleam of your taillights fading east to find yourself a better life.
I’ll never stop posting Death Cab lyrics. I swear it.
I was searching for some legal document as the rain beat down on the hood. When I stumbled upon pictures I tried to forget and that’s how this idea was drilled into my head. Cause it’s too important to stay the way it’s been.
Goodbye 2005, I loved you and all of the fucked up moments that we shared. All of those times where I sat alone in my bed, or passed out in the bathroom after drinking too much. All the nights I drove out to your house at 2AM because you said you wanted me to sleep over. I’ll miss Coldplay and guitar and Jesus and the Mary Chain, Just Like Honey and nights with the blue light on, with the red light on, with no lights on, late nights at Neighbors and drinking wine in the car and hitting construction cones in the Teal Beast (R.I.P.), the parties I threw just to get your attention that you never came to, Brad and Jen, waking up next to you in the dark when you kiss my forehead, the Yankees, crying on the white bed sheets and bleeding mascara all over, Death Cab in my car on lunch break, the vodka and wheat bread diet, the beach sand in my toes, Radiohead, and finding out what love is really all about. Christ.. the past year and a half is all blending together. I need to get a grip.
There’s no blame for how our love did slowly fade and now that it’s gone it’s like it wasn’t there at all. And here I rest, where disappointment and regret collide when I’m lying awake at night.
He asked me what I’ve been doing since I moved here. Fuck. Is this it?