Closer still.

I agree with you 🙂

PS I’m still in time for your boob survey?

it’s large and scary

i like… i have a thing for people with any eye color other than brown… so purple is awesome

Whoa

Why would you think your father wants something FROM you? Like most parents, he probably just wants what’s best FOR you. Like you said, I don’t know you or your family, so there’s no way I could KNOW, but it seems that you’re putting a lot of pressure on yourself to live up to unspoken expectations. As far as your list goes, take it one step at a time. It’s slow-going. I’m 27 and still not there.

RYN: I know all about emotional arguments. I have those all the time and piss people off with my lack of logic. I just hate to see someone beating themselves up, emotionally, logically, or in any other way over things they can’t control. I don’t know you and can’t give any guarantees, but I think you’ll do just fine. If nothing else, I think you’d have a shot at making some $ by writing. 🙂

I guess I never thought of that. Not knowing you I mean. I guess that is why many people keep diaries in the first place. To be known without being known. You know? So I rephrase all my last comments and I say… From how you seem in your diary, you’re wonderful.

Oh, and isn’t it microcosm? Awww, shoot. Now that I typed it out it looks funny. You’re probably right, I’m useless.

I know this feeling. Really and truly I do. I’m failing and slipping and sliding and everybody tells me I can do better. I should do better. I just need to put some effort into it. What if the problem is that I have no capacity to try something that I don’t want to do? and ryn: no, actually. I meant it in a sarcastic, cute, flirty sort of way. The kind where I act surprised if you agree.

I used to have a school text book when I was sixteen that someone who had it before had written on “the greatest burden of all is potential”. Reasonably profound. Then I got around to thinking that people just used the word because they were full of hope for people’s future instead of praising them for the good things they were acheiving in the present. Not the worst thing someone could do.

I don’t take compliments too well, either. I never believe the people who give them. I think its because I didn’t get much praise when I was a child and a teenager, from anybody, except sometimes about my grades. So, when nobody says anything to you about such a thing for so long, how are you gonna believe that somebody suddenly thinks that? This is also why I have low self-esteem, I think.

i doubt any of us will ever come to a solution. we just need to have to learn to live with our flaws and our disappointments in ourselves? …or something. i dont knowbut i definitely understand… the unspoken expectations making you feel all the more disappointed when you do not succeed as others would expect/want you to. *hugs you* i’ve got that pretty bad. 😛

My eyeballs burn. Yes, I understand (not entirely that way) your pain. “You’re going to make it far inlife [insert name here]” Yes .. that is right .. Far .. That’s why iv been exspelled twice, and im doing grade 8 over agian 😀 Okay, so what else did you typeh about? Cannot remember. Yes, off to bed I go. Cheerio!

I feel the same way about compliments for the exact same reasons. I’ve just learned to not believe them. My paremts definitely have over-inflated expectations of me as well. The challenge is trying to transcend that point of feeling burdened and say, “F*ck it. I love you guys, but I’m going to live my life for me.” Which is tough because, hey, they’re your family. *shrugs*

RYN: Haha! I don’t think I have the balls for that. I did however print out your note and posted it on my closet in plain view. Maybe she’ll take a hint.

I’m not good at receiving compliments, either. 🙂

God, don’t blame the parents. The guilt I already feel for things I haven’t done yet….

This is how I feel. Screw it. If anyone gives you a complement just except it. Don’t over analyze. You’ll be a much happier person. PS – Can I add you to my favs?

RYN: It seems we need to set a few things straight here. *snicker* The guys getting off being an idea popularized by culture isn’t entirely true. I’ve experienced it first-hand. And guys have sex toys, too! Blow up dolls, jelly sleeves, pumps.. They’re coming up with new things daily! hehe.. And what’s this business about women being served?!?! I’ve never been served!! (cont..)

..I should protest! *giggle* And men can express themselves emotionally. I mean, sure, other guys may snicker and say they’re gay, but that’s just because they’re too insecure to do the same. Women LOVE guys who can express themselves emotionally. It reaches us on our level.

I will agree on the point of women’s bodies being more attractive. They’re gorgeous, if kept in good condition. And giving birth is indeed a miraculous thing. I watched my friend go through the entire process with my Godchild and was amazed.

And maybe no one is holding a razor to my legs, but no one would be holding my legs without me using a razor first! *giggles*

Oh, and men CAN and DO wear skirts. It was all the rage for a while for guys to wear long, flowy skirts with combat boots. 😉

“You do not need vaginal stimulation to orgasm.” heh.. Some of us unlucky ones do. ;P Besides, I rather enjoy the vaginal stimulation. *giggles*

That’s another thing, society views it as the male’s place to woo, but why? I’ve seen your pictures and, from reading your histories on relationships, I can say you seem to be a very respectful, sensitive, sweet guy. I can’t see why women WOULDN’T hit on you. I know I’ve seen several flirting their asses off on here. ;P

Okay, I’m sitting here open-mouthed at that last comment.. Some of us prefer males to show their emotional side because we’re emotion-based. It’s what we understand. Sure, males need to know just when and how to say certain things they’re expressing during certain times of the month, but life’s supposed to be challenging, right? *smirk*

Guys in Tallahassee wore skirts all the time. I was amazed when I first saw it, but I thought it was pretty sexy! hehe.. I’m odd, but the thought of easy access was as appealing to me as it is for a guy to see a female in a skirt. ;P

As far as a decent male maturbatory aide, I heard a segment on the radio about cutting a hole in a melon, heating the melon for a few seconds in the microwave and POOF! instant vagina. 😉 *rofl*

I own 2 at the moment. One isn’t all that great, though. He’s not happy enough. ;P

heh.. Out and about, horny old men hit on me. 😛

*laugh* More than old men hit on me, but I’ve noticed a lot of old men like me.. I have that old-timey “classic” look. I’m extremely curvy like the old nude paintings of the women on plush sofas. These days, women like me are considered as overweight. I am, a bit, but I look huge to some people because the stick-figure look is “in”.

I’d like to think I can express myself maturely when I need to. I mean, I guess it depends on the subject, but I can’t say for sure. It’d be a biased opinion and all. ;P

There’s a date-a-Timmy? hehe.. Sounds interesting. As far as people on here complimenting you, I can understand you feeling it’s not real. I’ve noticed compliments are given VERY freely around here. You do, however, have very nice eyes and I’ve always liked long hair, so ;P *giggles*

*laugh* I’m actually pretty proud of the body I have right now. I managed to lose 60 pounds last year and got my hourglass back. I could still survive quite a while during that food shortage, though. ;P

I’ve been told I have good “birthing hips”.. *rofl* What a compliment! ;P What DO people see of Timmy when he’s out and about? Are you shy in person? Do you show the same things as you show here or are you more reserved?

Yes, the smell does stick with you, especially when a woman is turned on. It gets that much sweeter-smelling, more potent. Get close enough and there’s no denying the hormones once you get a whiff..

I’ve been doing the same thing. It took me forever to listen to my gut and sometimes it’s still difficult to ignore my heart’s whiny voice telling me everyone’s got a good side. *snicker*

hehe.. Reading that list of “requirements”, I pretty much fit all of them..except the enjoying peeing thing. I mean, I pee, but it’s just a bodily function. I’ve never thought about enjoying it before. 😉

That’s how it should be, really. If you admire a girl, let her know you admire her and admire her the way you want.. as long as she knows you think she’s fabulous, she should be flattered. 🙂 For some of us, it’s the little things that count.

People can poke holes in any philosophy. Keep doing what you do. Eventually, someone will appreciate your way of thinking.

heh.. That’s because people in the “real world” are too worried about what everyone else will think. On here, we hide behind our diary names and say what we really think. It’s sad, really. I know, I’m guilty of it. I feel like you do..that people don’t seem interested in what I have to say in real life. So, I sit quietly and listen to everyone else, making rude comments in my mind. ;P

Damn me?!? hehe.. I didn’t do it! *giggles*

*grin* I’m sure some girl will be more than happy to let you fill that position for her and to love you. 😉

I’m not quite sure what to say to that. *snicker* Doesn’t make me uncomfy to know it, but it’s not like I can/would/could jump through the screen to offer it. ;P hhehehehe

ryn: The size of one’s hypothalamus has been linked with whether or not a person is gay, but that doesn’t explain the cause. Correlation does not imply causation.

think for myself. I know what they expect from me, but I can’t *give* it to them. I love them, they love me, blah, blah. But sometimes, they still look at me with something that closely resembles disgust. That hurts. Not knowing what I can do for them hurts. But all that matters really is making *me* happy. Hehe…I also like how the more you say you don’t want compliments, the more…

Like I said Timmy … you think too much! Stop rationalising the ‘truthness’ to a compliment – accept it graciously, say thankyou – even if you don’t believe it! Martin tells me I’m the most beautiful woman in the world – I accept it, thank him, – even though I know it’s not true!

*rofl* Sorry, got distracted by a phone call. 😉 And whaddaya know, I talked dirty! hehe

Woo! 46 notes from Timmy on one entry! *snicker*

I learned not to expect anything of myself. My family already has enough expectations.