4-23-13

I look at that picture now (in the previous entry) and am amazed that anyone lived through that, and I’m ever so grateful that I have all my parts and that they function more or less like they should.

I look around at this studio apartment, which I have lived in since getting out of the Adult Foster Care Home in January of 1999, and think, well, I wouldn’t be HERE if it wasn’t for that wreck, would I.

A timely phone call just ended: my friend K*, my former wife, my friend, my supporter, called, unaware that today was THE DAY. It is and was and always will be, for me, THE DAY, but 4/23 is just another day to most everyone else, and that’s OK. People I’ve talked to today say "wow! 15 years ago?!" Some of them were there, then, and same come to see me in Intensive Care, and all of them have been there for me, but the thought that it was 15 years ago is pretty astounding – so much time has gone by.

Personally, I think that if I had been on this series of medications, before this point in time, things would have been different.

But that’s a road not taken, and who knows what might have happened? Some points in my life, I can really see or know what would have been different, and I just talked to one person who I know – well, I KNOW that things would have been different, had I not chosen the path I did then.

(This doesn’t make complete sense as I write these words, but I know what I’m thinking, and what I am knowing: She is still in my life, and still cares about me)

15 years later and I am still here, after that wreck, that, if I didn’t know better, I would have bet no one came out of alive. Certainly not in as good a shape as I am, now, and then too.

Onwards.

I’m not sure where I’m going, but I am, and that’s good enough for this instant.

Onwards.

 

*****