hormones

so, the hormones are kicking me now.  while we were at our niece’s gymnastics recital, i almost started crying watching her.  just now, my husband emailed me (after i told him how i was feeling yucky) to tell me he wishes he could be here to cuddle me and take care of me and my eyes welled up.  last night, i started bawling b/c i thought he was mad at me (he insisted he wasn’t) and b/c i love my baby so much already and i’m so nervous about his/her health. i can’t wait to see the doctor so that she can hopefully alleviate some worry. 

i have d all worried that i’m constantly sad.  he just doesn’t understand the emotions i’m going through.  he keeps telling me to smile and just now he emailed me to tell me he’s going off to lunch and to say: “smile you’re gunna be a mommy”…yeah, the spelling leaves a bit to be desired but it made me smile anyway.

today, i feel nauseous.  haven’t felt that in a while.  i wonder if the pregnancy sickness is going to kick in after all. i have enough problems with the gas pains.  i don’t need to add in puking.  i’m scared that i might have a bit of lactose intolerance.  i think that’s what’s causing my gas and frequent BMs (other than the usual-before-pregnancy problems i had before). sorry about the grossness. otherwise, it’s just that i haven’t been taking my psyllium.  i don’t know if i can but i sure wish i knew.

i also feel hot, cold, hot, cold. i turned the heat off and opened the screen door (at the back of the house) and then got cold so i shut it again and turned the heat back on.  now i have the heat on and that door open b/c the dog is out there and i want the cats to be able to look out the screen. they love an open window.  it’s 20 degrees celcius (sorry to any americans, i don’t understand fahrenheit) outside and my body temperature is all over the place.  i’d like to sit outside later. we’ll see how that goes.  it’s so weird. normally i love the heat. there’s nothing i love more than 25 degree weather.  i’m never hot…well, i wasn’t before i was pregnant.  i was always cold. now i never know what my temperature is going to be. 

but oh well.  as long as baby is happy, i’m happy.

we looked over my list of baby names last night.  we’ve narrowed it down, but you never know if we’ll change our minds.  i just wanted to know what names d liked.  i wanted to see if we were on the same wavelength.  we are.  we really are with the girl’s name we both really like. what a weird coincidence.  i had a weird feeling about a certain name and it’s the name he likes best.  i know it’s weird not to say it, but, for some reason, i don’t want to yet.  just chalk it up to me being strange.  for now, i call him/her “baby”.

so, from baby and me, have a nice day.

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