The “Pathetic”, “Sectarian” Republic of Ireland

At this time of year, with 17 March only around the corner, my thoughts turn to……America. That’s all St. Patrick’s Day is now; a collection of Americans in green celebrating their ethnic badge. With most of the Irish government there cheering them on. Isn’t it strange the way the government is always out of the country on what’s supposed to be the most Irish day of the year? I mean, they could send anyone to the parade in Chicago or whatever; do they really know what the Irish Minister for Enterprise, Trade and Employment looks like? She looks like a hamster, by the way…….

The “Pathetic”, “Sectarian” Republic of Ireland

But while I’d love to think St. Patrick’s Day is a chance to re-examine what it is to be Irish, I know it isn’t. Paddy’s Day is all about reinforcing true (drunkeness) and untrue (backwardness) stereotypes of Ireland, mainly because they make us money. And who’s more qualified to talk about Irishness than David Trimble, First Minister of Northern Ireland, joint-winner of the Nobel Peace Prize, leader of the Ulser Unionist Party and Member of Parliament in the newly-designated city of Lisburn. What an idiot David Trimble is. Just when I was beginning to think “well look how far he’s come, he’s really put it up to Sinn Fein”, he turns around and, in the biggest pot-calling-kettle-black incident of 2002 so far, calls the Republic of Ireland “pathetic” and “sectarian”. The most trouble we’re having in our hospitals are over-crowding and bad conditions for nurses in casualty (ER) areas. In Northern Ireland, there are tensions between Protestants and Catholics working in the Royal Victoria Hospital. That’s both pathetic AND sectarian, all in the one place. And what’s more, I heard there were Protestant clerymen from the Republic coming out against David Trimble’s comments. In Northern Ireland, Catholics have felt discriminated against for years. I don’t think you’ll find a Protestant in the Republic with the same issues. With the exception of an ugly time in the early 20’s, the Republic of Ireland has been very non-sectarian in practice for almost all it’s history and in theory Church and State were separated after the people voted to take out the Catholic church’s special position in the constitution nearly 30 years ago. Jeffrey Donaldson, a man said by many to be a front-runner for the leadership of the Ulster Unionist Party, said last week that the Catholic church’s special position in the Irish constitution showed how sectarian we were. That’s how little the unionists know about the Republic. That’s pathetic. As for sectarian; well the Republic has had two Protestant presidents (the very first, Dr. Douglas Hyde and Erskine Childers in the 70’s) in a country where less than 10% are Protestant. How many Catholic Prime Ministers/First Ministers has 47% Catholic (less than 40% 80 years ago) Northern Ireland had? Precisely zero.

We’ve had three Jewish TDs serving in the Dáil (Alan Shatter, who’s still there, Ben Briscoe and Mervyn Taylor) in a country with less than 5000 Jews and we’d have had a non-Catholic prime minister had a worthy one emerged. Protestants have done better in the Republic, much much better, than Catholics have in Northern Ireland and that’s the simple fact.

I know a good few Protestants and it’s simply not an issue; they’re as Irish as anyone else. Yet in Northern Ireland, many people my age wouldn’t know many from “the other side”. Northern Ireland has problems with civil order; the fact is it could all go up in smoke if a few inflammatory incidents took place in quick succession, even now. The Republic of Ireland, bad and all as it is with corruption, congestion, social divison and industrial strife, is long out of those woods and had ascended to become a disportionately large cultural influence in the world.

But the most important thing at the end of the day is for Mr Trimble to realise that if he is this great statesman he undoubtedly wants to be remembered as, then he should know better than to call the adjoining state, with which he does a lot of business with, “pathetic”. It’s bad diplomacy; no decent-thinking leader does that. If Tony Blair has a problem with Jacques Chirac doing feck-all about the refugee camp at the entrance to the Channel Tunnel, he doesn’t go and call anyone “pathetic”. You just don’t do that.

j