Little things eating away?

Most opf the time these little things are to little to do anythink.. But when I get down.. like I feel I am right now.. They do get at me.. i just keep thinjking about all the times I have fucked things up… And feel that its all going to come bak at me and fuck things up for me!!! What i have with Christie is to special to let somethink fuck things up, But times like now I feel like I have already fucked up… I feel that she has lost interest in me.. iuts not like I am gpoing to just go up to her and say, hey have you lost interest in me.. For one.. i prolly couldn’t get the gutts to do it.. and two.. She would wonder were the hell it is coming from if she hasn’t lost any interest in me!!!!

Fuck its hot in here.. Have to take jumper off!!!!

Now I’ve got Shane and Rae talkin to me.. rae talkin bout retards, and Shane talkin bout Melb and laura!!!

I kinda lost it on the whole things eating away at me… Well I guess in the end they dont do much to me at all aslong as i keep in good moods… And thats most of the time… I’m sure once I hear fronm Christie all the shit from around here will be out of my head…

I bet she doesn’t think i depend on her like that…

She more like a way of living… Someone to help me through all the shit.. By just being herself… Helping without her realiseing shes helping… or maybe she does??

Maybe she knows that she has become a part of my life I need… i just hope that I am becoming a part of her life that she needs… i just wish i understood how she feels… I can only hope for the day that I can hold her without worrying whos going to see us.. if that day ever comes :S Well i think thats enough jibber for now.. I’ll prolly go on lata tho… Well thats it…

Luke…