what is wrong with me…

why is it whenever i do something stupid, something i know i shouldn’t do (having to do with a certain person from my past) i get all messed up.  i start stuttering really bad, and i get all depressed.  my chest gets really heavy and i feel as if i can’t breathe. 

its like i reopened a wound that had just barely healed, only to gush blood once again.  i’m hurting all over again… its starting, all over again…

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December 6, 2004

Noah…what’s wrong? Are you okay? *hugs you tightly*

i am so sorry. live and learn i guess. everything is a learning experience. write back.

wow the way you speak of her is the way i think of my old relationship. example: i can remember him saying noone will ever love you the way i do. sighs…i am thinking of you. i know it takes so much time to get over. but i don’t think you ever really get over it. you just move on. whatcha think? could i have you as a friend until someone steals you away? ttyl.

December 6, 2004

Oh Noah sweety … *pats space next to her* … come here, you need brownies, chocolate milk and some snuggling!

I was in love with the same person for 5 years. Even after he got married I still loved him and was still in denial. I know how you feel and I know that saying that it just takes time is so cliche, but it is true. After 9 years I am over him, yes I still wonder now (he stopped talking to me after I got married)how he is. You always in some small miniscule way will love that person regardless

And it sucks monkey ass. I will be praying for you, Noah. *Gives big hug all the way from Missouri* Amber