4 U…………..FUCK u!!!!
Its funny that you say I do ALL that shit ALL THE TIME…….Cause I don’t. I haven’t done cocaine in like a month and a bit…I am done with it. No Paul is not an influence. I did that shit with his brother. Also the only time I got drunk and smoked up (In a LONG while) was on new years….so get your fucken facts straight. Well your young so I guess you don’t think to clearly. That’s probably why you like Kim so much. She gives you all the weed you want and you go get tattoos together. Your 16 and get a Lion on your back ‘Kim’s little Lion’….ha-ha….now you want to get a Pegasus…..That’s what you call her RIGHT? Yes you do. WOW you are smart!!!!!
I no what the hell ‘HURT’ is. I no when the man I called ‘DADDY’ does shit to me from 5-12………………….THAT HURTS……………..So when something like that happens to you then say something about it.
IT HAPPENED YEARS AGO BUT IF YOU UNDERSTOOD WHY IT STILL BUGS ME THEN YOU WOULD NOT BE SUCH A JERK ABOUT IT. ITS MY DEPRESSION THAT I CAN NOT CONTROL……………WHEN PEOPLE TRIGGER THE SHIT I HAVE BEEN THROUGH I LOSE IT. SO READ UP ON IT BEFORE YOU JUDGE. I SPOKE TO A PROFESSIONAL…………SO BITE ME.
I have had a bad life and still can not deal with my depression. I spoke to someone about it and I am going to get help. You wouldn’t understand but I got people who do. They see that I am not messed up…as you would say I am. They say the things I do is normal for me….I can’t control my triggers. But there are people who can help me with that.
I no where to find you, but I will NEVER look. I NEVER want to see you again. I hate you that much. Its not a LOSS it’s a privilege. I am happy I found someone who can see that I am not a bad person for what I do and really love me. He also will not say months down the road ‘I don’t know if I love you’………I no you lie. You lied when you said you didn’t love Kim and that you loved me. You NEVER loved me. I was your fun. You where so happy that I liked you for a little over 6 years. Played games with me making me think you wanted me then date others……………say to me later that you should have went out with me…….Then this ex bitch your with now………tells me you want her and foolish me didn’t believe her. Now you guys are better then ever. WELL FUCK ME for being so dumb. Have a good life with her. You no you want to be happy and she does it for you then HELL BE HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!
I can change………I have. I got it all. The job the cats the dog. I got it. People slip………….You do too. Doesn’t mean that I haven’t changed. I am happy you don’t know me. You never could anyways. You never looked deep into what was going on with me. If you did………..you would see I am just hurt and a great person. Your not the reason I do anything. You just trigger shit. If you where the reasons to anything then god it would be sad. I am not going to base anything of my life on you. Your not worth it.
So this is all you have too say ‘Let Paul deal with your bullshit because I’m fucking done’ Well I am happy you are done….cause he is doing a fine ass job of REALLY HELPING ME………..
You say that cause I don’t want to talk to you anymore is my chose. WHAT THE HELL……………..you write this fucken entry where you say I am nasty and all this shit. I call to find out what the hell I did and you say ‘I cant even talk about it right now’…………….you tell me you never want to see me. So I agree. So don’t turn this shit around.
Glad I found out what kind of person you could be….before I stayed friends with you any longer. 8 years of loving you was a waste of time. I will stick with the people who do love me and understand that I am not as bad as you make me out to be. If I was so bad then how come people love me? They see what I do BUT understand. People do and act the way I do too………………people have problems. BUT good people would not tell them to SUCK IT UP and YOUR DISGUSTING. That’s not right………….I would NEVER do that to someone. I would understand. That’s a FRIEND. I don’t know what you are.
-JUST FORGET ABOUT THE DAY YOU EVER MET ME…….SO I CAN FORGET ABOUT YOU-