Enough
This past week has been a hot mess for me. While life throws me bombs, I seem to be able to solve my problems quickly when I get stuck. Every teacher is ready to end the school year. But there still is a pile of work to do with students, lesson planning, and completing deadlines. I put up with certain staff member’s shit, every single one this past week, well except one <3
Getting yelled at in front of other staff sure makes me the tiny person there is. All because I remind people to do their work and support me as a new teacher at the school site. It has been so much that I have faced many frustrations when I requested things like a printer for my classroom for over a month, my site mentor rushing me to end our after work hours meeting, the school principal and his inability to want to attend the two meetings I held that week, and just everyone talking to me like crap. I know I’m no God. I guess I feel that if I don’t give reminders, people will forget or do so at the last minute, and even find an excuse to blame me for my lack of communication with them… I don’t say much or do anything at the end.
Today, I stopped by my parents’ home address because I left my car keys last night. Little did I show up, my mom talked to my wife to get things straightened up. I think I was a total coward to leave from the drama scene and went inside the house to drop off some things without having to deal with more problems, what for? I had enough problems and stresses from work. Mom is threatening my wife possibly taking my daughter away from her… The blood calls, mom said, but it calls for danger. She thinks my wife being her non-biological mom for our daughter has minimal power over her. When I’m six feet underground, I would 10 times sign a testament for my wife to have that full custody, so if she does gets send or get threatened by the comment “Go back to Mexico.” She can take OUR daughter away. I rather have my daughter be in good hands with my wife than lending her to my own mother’s supervision. Mom wasn’t there since the day her granddaughter was born. Long sleepless nights, body aches, the baby blues, was all part to receive from her punishment is her absences. She hasn’t been available not even until this day.
My granddaughter is blossoming without warm loving space home environment to move freely, play with her toys, eat well, being well cared of by their grandparents. Unfortunately, I had to say that their attitudes grosses me out. They rather have the dog dominating every direction she goes bites off her food, toys, and dumps her to the ground. That’s hilarious to mom. With me, I get hugs from them, good meals, and all where my daughter just gets the cold shoulder? I wish they could hate me, that is an absurd love. I wanted to be a mom, I deserve to be called a mom too. Why am I different from my older sister? Because she married a man after delivering her 1st grandchild, and did the right thing to please the whole family? My daughter is innocent, please blame me for giving her a life. A life in which she doesn’t deserve to be mistreated from people their own blood.
No one is brainwashing me. That’s just sad that mom is using every lie not to include me in upcoming events. Regardless, I didn’t plan on going anywhere and causing embarrassment. She should shrink with embarrassment to offend her people like she did with my wife. It took her too long to get her U.S. citizenship, afraid of disputing Trump’s orders, I would assume. She’s become an American. Not even me that I been born here all my life.