Dirty Hair

I’ve got this annoying thing lately where I have patch of dirty hair after I shower. I’ll try to make sure that I get the patch and it’ll just be somewhere else. It’s so frustrating and annoying.

I have IBD, Crohn’s disease, and I get tired quicker than normal people. I have decide what is worth the energy.

Most people have been so ill at some point that they really just wanted to eat, go to the bathroom then go back to sleep. Knowing that you’ll feel better after the sleep. Your immune system is battling something nasty and it really just needs you to do shut down for a bit so it can use those resources.

My “military” has a malfunction. Maybe they’re colorblind or something and don’t recognize allies, idk. But my guys attack my intestinal tract like it’s foreign and invading. There’s always a battle going on.

Some days it’s better, some days it’s worse. I can’t ever know in advance which it will be. I try to understand, but something always changes and doesn’t fit into what I predicted.

It’s fucking hard.

My brain still thinks that going to sleep will help immensely. But the battle never stops and I want to live.

So today I took a shower and made a lasagna. That’s what my goal was, what I decided was worth the energy today. My hair had gross spots and I had to get back in and shampoo another time.

I’ve never had this issue before. I think it’s because I’m so sore and exhausted all the time.

Enough rambling.