Blah.

Why am I such a ridiculous person?  Why can’t I seem to do anything at all right, ever?  I just don’t feel like there is anything in my life that I am proud of.  Only things that I am not.  I’ve never done anything right, I make all the wrong decision, and whenever I do have something that is worth keeping, I seem to screw it up by trying to keep something that isn’t.  What is wrong with me?  I don’t understand how I can be like this.  I was always smarter than this.  I swear I have gotten stupider since I have been at school.  II was such a smart kid.  Or at least that is what everyone used to say, but I have always been oblivious.  I never knew when people were making fun of me, or didn’t like me.  I just didn’t notice.  I never payed enough attention I guess.  I just wish I knew what was going on before I fucked it up.  I hate this crap.  I’m just gonna screw everything up like I always so, so why do I even try anymore, theres not point.  BLAH!!!!!  I hate my life.

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All these “wrong” things…are they wrong b/c your heart tells you so, or because other people tell you so? There’s a big difference. :)hugs