DECADE

The first year is the best, they aren’t so far gone and you barley stop yourself from going to visit.  The second year is ok because there’s always more time.  The third year is tricky but you manage to stay busy enough to mute your thoughts.  The fourth year you realize it’s going to be a horrible road.  During the fifth year you lose your mind.  Year six is when you lose the ability to feel.  Year seven is when you learn how to mimic normal holiday feelings so that no one sees you naked.  Year eight… You come to accept that things change but it takes longer than you’ll live.  Year nine you are running down hallways in your mind dealing with massive amounts of mental violence.  

During year 10 you realize that you’ve died a thousand deaths.

It’s always been purgatory
it always will be.