My. It has been a minute.
Regretfully faithful readers, yours truly is not quite what he once was. In the years since we last spoke I have carved my identity into the world by throwing myself at one impossible task after the next, always failing, but eventually succeeding, at every turn. It has taken a particular toll, the cost for which was unavoidable per the rules. My thoughts delve no deeper than what’s pragmatic, and my heart climbs no higher than my knees. Lost my grandpa in September, not to death, but something worse. And the girl, ah yes, of course the girl. Should have known better in my ripe old age, but 98 lbs of 21 year old energy and optimism begging me to carry it about was too much to resist, even if I could Taylor Swift the end before it began. She showed up in my life with no one and no past, like a gust on a hot day, and vanished in similar fashion. Now she’s somewhere else. Once again with no past, once again at someone’s door. That poor kid. I bestowed upon her all the sweetness and grace I was capable of, but nothing I had could hold her. Just not in her nature, and I respect that. Alas however there is nothing in my nature that renders me capable of erasing the past in such a way, and for a very long while at least- if not forever- I shall be accompanied by the ghost of a last chance that passed me by in sunglasses.