Recent Entries

• 23, Ended my contractual work

  May 26, 2025

  Hello—long time, no notes! I just want to write about my life these past few weeks. I know my last entry was about struggling with the same problem last year. Back then, I thought I would meet amazing people—just like I did during my internship. But because of the work setup, I didn’t get the&hel...

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• Midnight Feels Hit Different

  October 19, 2024

  I woke up at 12 AM out of nowhere and just felt the need to cry. No idea what triggered it, but I guess it's partly because I struggled to sleep the whole day yesterday—finally crashed around 4 PM. It almost felt like I slept from dusk till midnight. The lack of a proper mattress…

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• 22, Almost 3 months of finding a job

  October 8, 2024

  To anyone who's reading this, believe that there's always hope and a room for you. Shift your thinking, even if it's just for a temporary joy, and embrace the opportunity to feel that way until it passes. Today, I woke up at 5 PM to the most incredible news—Ms. Christine from the company reached ...

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• 22, Tomorrow is our recognition day

  July 21, 2024

  Hi, long time no entry. I just woke up past 5am today, and earlier, when I was still awake, I was just crying and begging for God to let me sleep. I told him that I couldn't sleep for 3 days, that my body was shutting down, and that my mind wasn't at peace. It…

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• 22, The only graduation gift I want is a job

  July 15, 2024

  I got burned out from staying too long on LinkedIn. I am so tired. The employment rate here in The Philippines was low because of their unrealistic standards. How can these recruiters post something like 3-5 years of experience, yet the available companies accepting fresh graduates have hundreds ...

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• 22, Now I understand adults

  July 8, 2024

  Way back when I used to be a kid, I didn't understand adults who were always mad, bitter, angry, and had this bitterness on their faces. In this cartoon called Spongebob squarepants, I always ask  my sister about Squidward because I was annoyed by his character, and now I get it. Also, I realized...

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• 22, Baby steps

  July 6, 2024

  I haven't been able to sleep for 8 hours these past few months, I've been so hard on myself, just focusing on the thing that were clearly out of my control. As much as possible, I avoid dwelling on the past but it seems like I have this relapse and I am all over the…

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• 22, and I’m still unemployed

  July 2, 2024

  I wish to be better, I wish to have a job, even though my graduation is on August 2. :( I'm just a girl, and I just want to do something valuable.

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• 22, Poem I wote

  July 1, 2024

  29 Aug 2022   “Disentanglement”   She was once loved by the demons, and so she had loved her back Scared to the unprecedented, she engraves her naive thoughts into feeding her insatiable monsters Echoing the delusionality of the future, she has tainted She has this heavy baggage she has...

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