Dead Broke and an agent

I just want to yell and cry and scream my brains out.  Im so frustrated I can’t even talk about it.

I know this is part of life.  Life is cyclical, good, bad and ok times.

It’s just a part of life…

I feel like everyone including my parents lied to me.  “Just go to college and you’ll have a good job and you’ll never worry about financial issue”… that didn’t happen.

Coming out of college I had massive amount of student debt and got a job making $9/ hr with a degree! Then I climbed to $18/hr then $50k a year and now…BROKE.  Dead broke and a realtor.

Lost my job at 28 years old,  I’m 29 now with no income and a real estate license.  WTF happened to my life.

Working with rental prospects who waste my time.  WTF!!!

I’m so angry and frustrated.  I get the BS, “You can do it” from my real estate team lead who is making millions.  I just need some sort of income. My account is negative $200. I have bills piling up.  Student loans were deferred for 3 months and they will be rearing their ugly heads again. UUUGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Most days I’m happy and trying to enjoy the process of grinding it out to make money as a realtor.  Some days like today, I feel hopeless and lost. What am I supposed to do? What is my purpose in life??? I’m also trying to figure that out but I have no clue.  Absolutely no clue. The frustration I feel right now is beyond comprehension. Especially when there’s no income coming in and I’m trying to figure out my purpose in life.

My wedding is in 8 months and I have no money.  I’ve applied to all types of jobs, janitorial work to fast food to Administrative Assistant jobs, but still nothing after 4 months.  I never thought my life would be where I’m at right now. I just need guidance and direction. I have no money for a life coach or any type of coach.  I have no money to be an agent with all the fees I get hit with monthly. I have no money to even pay the property tax bill that’s delinquent or my delinquent bills.  I have nothing right now, but that’s not true.

I have my health, my husband, my son, my sanity, and most important of all the love of God.  But why do I still feel hopeless and lost?? Is money that important?? Does it trump God?? It shouldn’t but…not contributing financially makes me feel like a piece of shit.

I’m trying to seek God, through all of this and most days I do a good job.  Today, I need a little more strength from God to get through the day. I know that God is bigger than all of this, but today I feel down.  I know tomorrow I will not feel like this, but right now, I’m dead broke and a realtor.

From anonymous, Bald Realtor.