Oracle : Pt 2

 

So you have returned.

FEAST!

Wanna smoosh your boobies on me?

Sure, come on over here.

 

Shaken or Stirred?

 I like my babies shaken and my steak stirred.

ha kidding.
i do like shaken iced tea. and cocktails. and your mom.

 

1.Do you think the zombie apocolypse will coincide with the whole 2012 thing?

Nah, I don’t believe in 2012. Zombies cannot be predicted, only prepared for.

 

2. What’s your favorite holiday?

Thanksgiving I think. it’s not about presents or any of that. Just getting together with family and eating a bunch of food. My kind of day!

 

3. Fish as pets: dumb or adorable?

I’d say adorable. But very time consuming and annoying and I will never have an aquarium. However, in my dream house, it would have a giant koi pond near the japanese inspired garden with a fountain/waterfall in the left rear corner of the yard.

 

4. What’s your biggest pet peeve?

Stupidity. And by that I mean the rude, selfish, mentally deficient assholes that populate the earth. Maybe my biggest pet peeve is simply PEOPLE. haha

 

5. If you went into Witness Protection and had to completely change your identity (name, face, body, job history- everything!), what three things would you *keep*?

 Um… everything I would keep (online persona’s and the like) probably would be taken away. I would likely just keep my children and fiance. ha ha. I would love to change my hair and body. Maybe I’d keep my eyes, ears, and lips. those are nice features.

 

6. Chicken: baked, grilled, or fried?

Grilled!!! I love grilled meat. (that’s what she said)

 

7: What’s your most vivid childhood memory?

Hmmm, well… I have lots of them. But, sadly, the most vivid memory I have is one year leaving my mother after Christmas (Parents divorced when I was 2, I was probably 5 or 6 years old in the memory) and crying the entire ride home. I wanted my mommy.

 

8. Favorite sexual position/combo/kink?
Doggy style, hair in pigtails being pulled so hard my neck snaps back, blindfolded and or bound with ropes… while being spanked and called a dirty slut.

 

9. What is your stance on bullying?
I think that kids who get bullied should be able to kick the shit out of the bullier… My son gets bullied and I wish with all my might I could tell him to just clock the stupid assholes… instead I have to coach him on how to walk away and tell teachers and counselors. LAME SAUCE.

 

10. Describe your dream home!
I think I got this question twice. I will make an entry (with pictures!) for this later

 

11. Which television actor’s ass would you most like to spank and why?
the first that comes to mind is Damon Salvatore (Iam Somerhalder? or whatever) from Vampire Diaries. I keep having dreams about him. I would spank him and spank him and spank him and… wait.. hi… yeah *wipes drool*

 

12. Give it up: most embarassing celebrity crush!
Jack Black. I’d bone that man three ways from sunday. (I’m a little horny right now, no sex all weekend!)

 

 

13. Genital piercings: wow or oww?
OW. no way.not even cute on a guy… what if it comes out and pokes my vagina in the WRONG way?!

 

14. Have you ever slapped a ho?

Sadly, I have. I was trying to be a "tough girl in a gang" when I was about 14… and I slapped her good and hard into the wall and then picked up a baseball bat….

 

15. Zits: pop ’em or leave ’em alone?

Pop those bitches when they are ripe.

16. What pisses you off most about your fellow females?
That they are stupid. Honestly, the "smile in your face talk shit behind your back" thing drives me bonkers

 

17. Fuck, Marry, and Slap – video game characters – GO!
Fuck: that devil may cry guy.

marry: Titus from FFX-1

slap: Super Mario. SHAVE THAT PERVY STASH!

 

 

18. Share a favorite mommy moment per kid.
When Jonathon was a baby, I used to make up songs when giving him a bath. I remember one day he started singing the song with me (it had words like bop be bop in it) and I swear my heart exploded. And my first baby kisses. Love those.

Jacob has always been very attached to me.  Somewhat recently he told me that I was beautiful. I don’t always feel like that, so it made me all teary and I felt really loved.

 

19. What’s the craziest stunt you ever pulled as a kid?
Hmmm, I wasn’t much of a daredevil, but I did jump over this giant bunch of bushes in front of my cousins house ALL THE TIME. If I saw my kids doing that, I’d go nuts and make them stop. ha ha.

 

20. Wedding plans, missy! To elope or go the whole nine yards?

I am going to go about 4.5 yards. Small wedding ceremoney (I eloped teh first time and I wont’ do that to my parents again) and a somewhat more significant party / reception

 

21. Favorite candy or sweet?
Candy: Reeses Peanut butter cups minis, but sweet in general? ice cream all the way

 

22. What are you thinking… RIGHT NOW?

I’m goddamn hungry, I wish I was having a spicy chicken bowl, but i’m not and soup is stupid and I want my cheesy enchilada casserole right now.

*burp*

 

 

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  Last Words (A zombie apocalypse survival diary, for your reading pleasure and future knowledge when they take over the world. Yes, I am the author.)