spit in a bottle

Ok, so I have this bottle of envelope moistener I used to seal the envelopes. I would shudder to think how horrible it would be if i had to seal them all with my tongue. My poor tongue is much better suited to licking OTHER things for time on end. har har.

Anyway,  the stuff has a weird smell and sometimes it’s messy to work with. And all I can think of is that it’s someones saliva. And it grosses me out. And I imagine workers in a factory (like some poor sweatshop in china) sitting around spitting into a giant vat that mixes in a small amount of adhesive chemical (cuz it’s got that too) and then splurts it into a bottle.

splurt.

ew.

anyway, so i sometimes have to use my fingers to wipe it off the edge of an envelope or off my desk.

and it makes me gag.

so there ya go, a small moment in my world.

aren’t you glad I shared?

I’m getting SO ANTSY.

i want to DO THINGS.

bad things.

ok, so they aren’t BAD. JUST STUPID.

and i hate being STUPID.

stupid is for STUPIDS.

and i’d much rather call myself retarded and lame than STUPID.

der a duh der damnit duh.

i also keep cracking my knuckles. hello arhritis. so glad you could make it.

i’m doing something unwise today.

i’m drinking water for breakfast.

slim fast for lunch.

shut up.

it’s stupid.

but i want to.

and then i shall have dinner.

i will have food tomorrow, but i had nothing today and i just dont’ wanna spend money on food.

i need the money for gas.

to go…

ohhhh my fingers itch.

and my tummy growls.