oh my freakin’ yeah

OH GOD EMOTIONAL NIGHT!!!!!! haha but it turned out very nice. well im gonna keep everybody in suspense and talk a little about my day before i get into the sean events. i ended up staying up late last night waiting for sean because he always comes over before he goes back home to say good night and give me a good night kiss. so i waited up for that so it was like a little after 4am that i got to bed. anyway i had to wake up early this morning at like oh 8am. so im running on little sleep today. so we all got ready and went to the home and garden show. oh yeah worst idea ever. you should not ever let me be around a million people like that when a) i dont generally like people to begin with b) i do not like being touched, even slightly, by strange people c) i missed sean and d) i have had 3 hours and 45 minutes of sleep. so yeah we finally got out of there and went and took my niece and nephew to fly their new kites. it was so much fun but we were all wore out from being up early and in a crowded building then in the heat flying kites. so i came home and just like crashed for a while. then i got up and went bowling with my parents. so much fun. sean wanted to come but he ended up having to do some grinding and painting on their new truck bed. so yeah we did that then i came home and had dinner and was pouting because a) i was still freaking tired b) it was extremely hot in my house c) nothing good was on tv and d) sean was taking about a year and a half to get his ass into town. finally finally sean calls and im half asleep already so i jump up and get myself all sexified to go out. then it gets crazy. i was having fun then all of a sudden i dont even know what the fuck happened. well we’d been texting all day and he just wanted to be here and i wanted him here so he finally gets here and im like yeah this is gonna be awesome and we’re gonna have so much fun tonight blah blah blah and so we hung out for a bit went to a friends house which was ok then  we went to see kelly (cousins husband), everything was going good then i started thinking and then i got all emotional and was like sean i just wanna go home. so we had this really long talk about our emotions and how we feel and thats weird because even though i can babble about how i feel on here its so hard when he’s looking at me and all like tell me whats wrong and what you’re feeling. so we both made each other say what we were thinking. basically it turned out like this. i dig him SO much, and i started thinking that it was too much. well he starts telling me how he thinks that i just dont feel like he cares as much as i do. like my feelings were stronger for him than his feelings were for me. which he proceeded to tell me was completely untrue. then he apologized if he’d ever made me feel that way because its not true. so we got some of that out in the open and we talked about us both being kinda scared at what we were getting into. but we seemed to work that out and he brought me home and came inside and it was weird because we both just instinctively got into pajamas (well me into shorts and a tank top) and he stripped down to his boxers. and we lit some candles and just layed there talking. more emotional stuff came up. he is just holding me and im just reveling in the fact that i have this most awesome guy in my life. so yeah he started being all mushy and i was joking about how i had to start taking care of him and he’s like ‘well if you’re taking care of me then im most definately going to start taking care of you too’ then he kinda gave me this look and i was all like what. (and i know exactly what this look is. . .its a ‘im happy being with you look’) but i still like hearing him say it. so i said what and he’s like you know what this look is and you know what it means whenever i look at you with my ‘lovey dovey’ eyes. hehe so we talked and talked and about a billion more mushy things were said and we would probably have ended up making everyone sick with how mushy and lovey we were being. so then we came to what i had been wanting to ask or bring up. i start out saying ‘so do you think like anybody, i mean like my family mostly, thinks its weird that we’re ‘seeing’ each other?’ and he’s like no blah blah blah, then he starts talking about how it doesnt matter what anybody thinks as long as im happy and my parents like him thats all that matters to him. so i push it a little more by saying ‘blah blah blah yeah its just weird having to answer their questions because i dont technically know what we are or whatever’ and he’s like ‘blah blah blah i know what you’re saying. . .and i know what you’re getting at because every girl always wants to know this. . .and yeah i’d say we are dating’ so yeah score one for me. but we also decided that we’re not labeling anything. we’re just letting whatever it is be whatever it is. no pushing anything and no making it a big deal. so like when people ask me if we are i can say well yeah we’re dating instead of having to be all like ‘well kinda, i mean we’re seeing each other, not exclusively, but i mean we’re not boyfriend/girlfriend, but we arent seeing other people. blah blah blah’  so its like yeah we are anyway next topic. so needless to say im too freakin excited to sleep. so woooooooooooooo im gonna go flip out and scream silently at how extraordinarly awesome everything is!!!!