True and Toxic Love

TRUE LOVE-   Development of self first priority.
TOXIC LOVE – Obsession with relationship

TRUE LOVE- Room to grow, expand, desire for other to grow.
TOXIC LOVE- intensity of need seen as proof of love, usually insecurity, fear

TRUE LOVE- Separate interests, maintain other meaningful relationships.
TOXIC LOVE- Total involvement, limited social life, neglect old friends, interests.

TRUE LOVE- Encouragement of each others success.
TOXIC LOVE Preoccupation with others behavior, desire to change them.

TRUE LOVE – Appropriate trust, trusting partner
TOXIC LOVE- Jealousy, possessiveness, fear of competition.

TRUE LOVE – Compromising, problem solving together.
TOXIC LOVE- Power plays for control, blaming, passive, or aggressive manipulation.

TRUE LOVE – Embracing of each others individuality.
TOXIC LOVE -Trying to change other to own image.

TRUE LOVE – Relationship deals with all aspects of reality.
TOXIC LOVE – Relationship based on delusion and avoid unpleasant realities.

TRUE LOVE – Self-care by both partners, emotional state not dependent on others mood.
TOXIC LOVE – Expectation partner will fix and rescue the other.

TRUE LOVE – Loving detachment (healthy concern about partner while letting go)
TOXIC LOVE – Fusion (being obsessed with other)

TRUE LOVE – Ability to enjoy being alone
TOXIC LOVE – Unable to endure seperation; clinging.

TRUE LOVE -Cycle of comfort and contentment.
TOXIC LOVE – Cycle of pain and despair