guardian at the gate

Past the breakwater, out a little ways on the water is a fortress that I had forgotten was there. It’s built of bedrock, more like a prison than a palace. It’s a difficult journey to get there, rocks built to smash boats or casual swimmers who ventured too close. It’s manned by cannons and monsters. It’s the final hurdle to the core, and as such – it’s not meant to be easy. No one has ever gotten that far. You’re coming close.

If you make it past the treacherous tides to the entrance, you’re confronted by two stone gargoyles, perched like wary guard dogs on the concrete steps, up the cliff face to the fortress. It must be an imposing view from up down there. I wouldn’t know. I’ve been locked in my tower for decades, and I failed to find my way down. The lightning lights up the sky up there and gives me a clear view of my narrow world in brief flashes, like flickering candlelight in a narrow room. It’s hard to see clearly out of that needle thin window, like looking through the sky and trying to look through a star’s pinprick of light like a peep hole. I saw you struggling, your arms weary against the waves, the tides carrying you perilously close to the rocks below. For what it was worth, although I couldn’t reach out to help you – I wanted you to win. You finally collapsed at the foot of the long staircase, exhausted but determined. My breath caught in my throat and I stood there, floored, amazed that you had made it that far. No one’s feet but mine had ever made it onto the shores of this lonely, desolate island. It was too rocky for grass, to inhospitable for wildlife, minus the occasional bird looking for nesting material, kind of like me. I was scared for you, aware of the dangers you had still to face, wondering if you were determined enough to try – let alone to succeed. I hoped you would surprise me. I wanted it, out of anyone, ever, to be you. I whispered your name to the wind, and for the smallest fraction of a second, I thought you must have heard me. You looked up towards my window, your green eyes flashing in the minute illumination of a fortuitous lightning bolt – striking dangerously close to home. And I could have sworn in that minute that a small smile crossed your face – a smile full of the promise of hope. You were more determined than I thought.

You approached the two gargoyles a bit warily, yet resolutely. They moved in the proximity of your presence, equally determined to protect me. I whispered their names too…Loki and Layden, winged beasts, black granite on an opaque night. Their growls lifted into the air like thunder. But to my amazement, your hands came out – first your right, tracing a gentle touch across Loki’s scarred and weathered cheek. The growl turned into a low rumble I thought I recognized as a slight purring sound. Then your left, touching the top of Layden’s head, behind his ears, which perked in provocation but did not prompt an attack. Their fang filled mouths lifted in what might be considered a toothy smile. They knew something I had only dreamed, but never imagined could be real. And, together, they folded their wings behind their backs, bowing low and allowing you admittance. The rain had begun in earnest, and the waves were lapping at your feet, making your footing more precarious as you ventured forwards. The steps were steep and narrow. Slippery with moss that grew despite the dire conditions. The doorknob on the gate of the fortress was a lion’s head, with a ring through it’s nose. I’d be cranky, too. His roar shook the foundations as he demanded your name and purpose. I couldn’t hear your answer – it was unimportant. Carefully you slid the ring out of its metal placeholder, and set it on the ground. Chains were no longer necessary. And the giant, foreboding doors swung outward, almost of their own accord. My protections had realized what I was still discovering – that they were no longer needed. Not to you. That safety was to be found, in this instance in the risk, not without. That by locking myself away, I was preventing the joy of knowing happiness… and that I had no reason to fear you. As I sat on the edge of my tower bed like an errant rapunzel, only with much shorter hair, I heard a soft knock on the door. You opened it before I had the chance to open my mouth, and then, again before I could speak, your lips were on mine and I was wrapped up in the warmth of an embrace I had only dreamed of. You whispered to me then, softly, past the introductions of two souls that already recognized the familiarity of one another. “we can stay, if you want. I don’t mind”

“no…” I looked at you smiling…”I don’t need a prison to keep me from you, or one to keep you out…or one to lock you in. Just take me away”

“to where?”

“anywhere that you are. That’s where home is, now”