Doctoring and running *West memphis 3?!

I’m home, home at last from a 5 hour stint in various doctors’ offices. I had my bi-yearly diabetes check-up, the lab work associated with that, and my yearly pap exam. One major surprise that arose from that, however, was that I didn’t actually have to have a pap! How lovely it was to go in, speak with my doctor, have her tell me that they WILL put IUDs in women who haven’t been pregnant or had an abortion (news to me!), and then have her tell me, "Well, that’s it for this year! Protocol has changed for women in their twenties who are in a monogamous relationship and have never had an irregular pap. If you aren’t having any issues that you think I should take a peek at, then we can be done!" 

So, I was done!

I plan on making a follow-up appointment to get a little bit more information and allow myself a q&a session regarding me getting an IUD. I’ve wanted one for YEARS.

My diabetes doctor was shocked and surprised to see that I’ve been on welbutrin for the last year and a half; apparently he hadn’t noticed it at my last appointment in February. He asked me all kinds of questions, all of which I answered truthfully, to which he replied, "Do you think that you really need to be on it?"

I’m not going to lie, its a question that I ask myself from time to time. I don’t take it like I’m supposed to (2 times per day); I typically only remember to take it once per day. When I spent some time off of it last winter I definitely noticed a massive increase in the amount of crying that I was doing and I definitely had an issue with picking fights with Dave. He said that he could notice it, also, but I don’t know.

I’m kind of in the "if it isn’t broken, then don’t fix it" camp, I guess. But at the same time, if I really don’t need it, then why be on it? 

Additionally, I should note, that I’ve once again taken up running. That very likely is also making a difference in the way that I am feeling emotionally (I really do feel great). Maybe I won’t need it at all if I finally, once and for all, stick with it. (You know as well as I do that I tend to do this from time to time… I get extremely fed up with my physical appearance, take up running for a month or two, and then fall off of the wagon and go right back to where I was previously.). My plan with my running this time around is a little bit different than my previous plans, though. I’m not dieting or restricting my food in any way. I’m eating very normally and allowing myself little indulgences if I want them. I’m hoping that this change will make this running stint different than the ones that I’ve had in years past. I really want to make a lifestyle change. This is about losing weight- I can’t deny that- but I’m not in a hurry to do so. I just finally came to the conclusion that restricting and dieting (which are the ways that I’ve always depended on losing weight… well, that and purging [in the past; you know this]) isn’t working for me anymore. When I restrict and am very strict with my diet, I become even more food obsessed than I already am. I get irritable and sad and withdrawn and it’s awful. I inevitably end up binging like crazy (seriously, like crazy) and then feel even more awful about myself. Working out makes me feel good and will, hopefully, over time make a difference in my physical appearance.

Sounds like a win, win; right? 

I think so. I just hope that I can finally stick with this once and for all. I’m going full speed at this and plan on (and have been) running every day (of course allowing myself days off here and there if I need them… but only if I really need them). And when you have all of this lovely running space available to you only a few steps outside of your home, how can you not try to take advantage of it?!:

 

The lakes!

The lovely tree-lined paths that go around the lakes (yes, these are definitely very popular places to hang out during the summer)

The tunnel that goes under lake street. The path follows the area that connects Lake Calhoun to Lake of the Isles

 

 

These photos just show ONE reason why it’s awesome living where I live. Ugh, I love it here.

 

 **Edit:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/44199686/ns/us_news-crime_and_courts/

 

Seriously crying at my computer right now. Wow. It’s about goddamn motherfucking time.