Heather Sitting in a Tree (But Not With Me)

Matt, Matt, Matt.

Yeah. I’ve tried to tell you that you should stop doing that because really, it’s just time for you to move on. Nothing says you can’t get back together later should you both be single and both wish to be. J and I broke up… we went 2 years without anything romantic and then we found each other again and had an even BETTER relationship. Besides, why hold yourself back from experiencing something

new and exciting? Heather is the only love you know, the only relationship you know. Matt, there is so much of life you haven’t experienced yet and a lot of that revolves around your social life. You really need to get away from the computer, away from the phone, and go out and do things. You need to talk to girls. Learn how to talk to them IN PERSON. How to engage someone you’ve only just met

in conversation. Don’t get me wrong, Matt. I know you’re a fantastic conversationalist. I love talking to you! And I’m sure everyone else you talk to on the phone or online does too! And it’s great that you take these relationships off the computer and hang out with these people in person… but the one thing you haven’t really mastered yet is starting up conversations and keeping people (girls)

interested in person. We’ve talked about all of this so I don’t have to go further into it. It’s a tough time for anyone to realize their ex is dating someone new. Even if they thought that the ex was going to come back. The day I find out J is with someone new, I’m sure I’ll be a wreck and I’ll call you crying and it’ll take twenty “You deserve better”s from you for me to be unsad for a moment.

Obviously in your mind and in mine, there is no one better than Heather because she is my soul sister, but you know… There are other fish in the sea. And there are other kinds of girls you should experience relationships with, however casual or serious you want them to be. Consider it as you starting a new chapter in your life because you’re just going to do it again when you start your new job.

And when you start your new job, you will have to face even more social challenges because really, when you’re done with school, you don’t get to meet that many new people on a regular basis in any job. So I’d say get to know as many people now as you can so that you can keep those relationships going when you’re in the real world, working a stuffy job behind a desk, and you need some interaction

besides your old lady secretary. Now that I am in my post-college life, I’m really glad I developed a lot of my current relationships back in college because I don’t come across that many people I can maintain friendships with. I have 20-20 clients a day, but how well can you really get to know someone in an hour and then not see them until next year during tax season? Anyway. Good luck.

That sounds like a really difficult situation. I too am a person who lets myself think of other people and how my actions will affect them, similar to what you do with Heather. As hard as it may be you have to realize you need to do what is best for you, and if anything more should happen with you and Heather it will. Don’t place your life on hold for her.

What was your break up with her like?? I mean, circumstances, who did it, etc. etc.? ~I’ll be

Does she know you feel this way about her?

Jeez. I think anything I would’ve said has already been covered. Therefore, I won’t repeat it. You can just pretend I said it as well. :p. ♥ Andrea

Oh Matt. (ha! there, I said it to you this time). But I mean it in the same way you mean it when you say it to me. I completely agree with Locked and I’m sure that you do as well. And you’ve heard everyone’s opinions a million times from every one of us. So just remember this. I love you and I know that you can get through this and find someone that you will love even more then Heather. 🙂

I agree with everything locked said. You need to join a club at school, or get a hobby that gets you to interact with others. It’s not healthy to be stuck on the internet all day, and it’s not like being an accountant means you’ll have a lot of interaction with others. You’re gonna have to make friends soon, or else, i dont want to say this, but you’re gonna have a harder time making friends later

on. College is the best time to meet people with similar interests and personalities. Most people stay in touch with their college friends for the rest of their lives. My sis had a hard time opening up in her first yr and a half of college too, but she turned that all around. Now she goes out all the time, and has met people who she can have wonderful conversations with. So, all I’m saying is

it’s not too late. But you’ve got to do something soon. Love, Steph.

Sorry, I’m done lecturing you now! lol.

You’re still cute even when you are sad and depressed over other girls 🙂 I am not going to tell you to get a hobby or go make friends…James has had a girlfriend for almost 2yrs now and I’m still not completely over the idea of a future with him.

I don’t know you very well, but I hope things get better. I know that when I have crushes on people (I’ve never been in a relationship with anyone) that I consume myself with what they will think of me, and I just get bogged down with all of that. I’ve come to realize that it really isn’t that healthy for me… although it’s really difficult to stop. RYN: yeah, right? I love Johnny to death but… gosh.

I’ve done this. I don’t think I felt quite as devastated (or something) as you do until he told me he loved her, and again when he got engaged. And then she left him, and I flew across the country to visit him, and it took dating/getting dumped by a Swiss/German guy and then establishing a real relationship with someone else to get over him, or at least start to.

So what I’m trying to say is that I understand how much it sucks and that sort of irrational state of mind, but you’ll probably get past it after a while, when you least expect to.

Lots of advice here. I don’t know what to say.

That’s right. Live for you. Even if you are with someone and think about her, you should think about you too. RYN: I don’t mind it so much. I applied to the program because I knew it would help my networking and improve my writing skills.

Funny, people telling YOU to get a hobby…see, I don’t need one because I have been there and done the whole Get Booty Calls thing. Actually, maybe Booty Calls ARE my hobby…fvck Scrabble!! ~I’ll be

That’s rough. My best advice is keep busy and find something fun to occupy your time. It’s easier to regroup and bounce back when there’s little time to be sad and wistful. But wow, there are a lot of people here supporting you with great advice, so I think you’ll manage. RYN: First time for everything!

Matt, I don’t think it would do you any harm to have casual/random sex with someone.