Flash Monday; A russian Soul

When the mob began to swell I was going to swell along. That force that drives us down the short boulevard needed me somewhere else. I woke up in someone’s bathtub, days later, or maybe just hours.

“You have a Russian soul.”

“Yeah.”

“Dark.”

Yeah, I got it.”

Maybe she wanted to argue, I don’t know, I didn’t really know her, but I left. She was saying things behind and dogs were barking and a train whistle almost exactly as far away as I wanted to be. I walked to the tracks but it was already gone, again, already gone is where I wanted to be.

 

My bookie called my doctor and told him about my health. That was back west and a while ago. Neither profession is as omniscient as they lead you to believe, but they sure can scare the hell out of one another. I just don’t want anyone thinking I move without cause. I’m more afraid of inertia than anything else.

 

My phone rang so I tossed it. I got a letter from an ex, so I lost my address. Some kid on a gray hound asked me if I had accepted Christ, what kept me from jumping out the window is that he assumed I hadn’t. Well, shit, I didn’t know, there’s some blanks in my memory, they must be there for a reason. I almost did time for walking a mile in someone else’s shoes, but it turns out if you pay a fine it’s ok, next time I just bought some shoes.

 

“You have a Russian soul.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard that.”

“And yet you persist.”

“Doesn’t everyone?”

I knew that wasn’t true but just rattled the ice in her glass and I walked away slow. I used to ask myself why I wound up at bars so often, it’s a bit like asking myself why I don’t ride a horse, except I don’t wonder how I’m going to get my leg up over the bar. Someone I shared those kind of thoughts with suggested a saddle. I laughed when I walked away. It was a nervous laugh.

 

The last time I was in New York City I swore it’d be the last time. How can so many angry people be in love with that grey ghost? I found there’s a lot more who aren’t in New York City, they just get mad when I ask why not. Texans too, but, at least I can breathe in half of Texas. It’s a pretty low bar.

So, this is going somewhere, somewhere I’m not.