late winter Saturday afternoon in Winnipeg

I’m hoping the coffee will fuel some inspiration. I am such a chatterbox at times, you can’t shut me up. My tangents take an ex temporal form (if I’ve got what I’m saying right). They follow a logical progression, stay tied to the opening argument, attempt to stay in context with the original subject matter, which can be quite intense. I think they would be fascinating reading, but I cannot seem to get them into print very often.

Yesterday I thought about getting a voice-recording device of some kind. I could use my iPod for the purpose but then, I’m  thinking now, I might need something to denote the specific use.

Today has been a slow-moving day, as Saturdays generally are, especially when I’m working, as I have been for a couple of weeks now. Its back to the  salt mines for me, working in heavy industry again, maybe indefinitely.  I stayed up too late and woke a little too early as I am physically tired most of the  time again and so far I have done little productive aside from writing this.

I always mean to use my personal time more productively, have all sorts of aims from the sublime to the ridiculous. A glut of unfinished dreams, an archive or hermetic library of postponed dreams or potential outcomes for my life. Now I have reached an age where I can no longer keep the delusions of my youth, maybe thankfully. Anything literally was possible. Not much actually materialized but that did not stop me from piling on the interests or gestures of such, each or which in turn became an obligation warehoused  away. Still the impossibility did not strike me until I was old enough that the reality of my mortal limitations could no longer be avoided. Still I must attend to my basic personal matters better.

My girlfriend has a completely different view on how to use her personal time. It is often good for me to not take everything as seriously as I would if left to my own devices. She loves the trivial jetsam of facebook and cheap sensational entertainment. She likes to do this in the company of her loved ones. It is both unpressured and fulfilling for her and it is for me often too.