The Catherine Dilemma

I used to write an awful lot about a girl I met and became infatuated with. I’ve been reading back on my diary and it’s a common theme up until some time late last year. I thought I’d grown out of it, but maybe not. Oh feck, I’m cringing as I write this. Y’see, I think another…..well, not so much infatuation but certainly a period of liking someone is coming. Only it’s terribly terribly awkward. I’m not sure if I should even talk about this. But I have to, especially here.

This girl I may in some way like, Catherine, is a little different to girls I’ve liked in the past. She’s…..well, best get it out in the open now and say ladies and gentleman, Catherine is younger than me. As in almost four years younger. She’ll be 18 in October. And yes, in that top right-hand corner you’ll see there that I’m 21. And that’s not the worst. The worst bit is that she’s…….a friend of my sister’s. Yes, I know. It’s Jerry Springer material. Let me give you some context.

Most of my sister’s friends are grand. There’s a regular three or four of which Catherine is one, they’re fine and I’d have a laugh with them since they’re alwyas in the house. Then there’s a few others, most of whom annoy the crap out of me. The ones who…….I just can’t talk to in case I offend. It’s kinda important to me that I get on with my sister’s friends since there’s always one or two hanging around the house. But Catherine’s a little different.

Catherine dresses a little different to the rest, she’s in one of those green jackets with a German flag and purple cords while the rest are in glitter jeans or whatever. Catherine is far more mature and less prone to the utter bitchiness that consumes the rest given half a chance. Catherine is 17!!! I feel like that Humbert bloke off Lolita!!!

But maybe thee’s a part of me that’s saying I shouldn’t feel lke that, because three years of n age gap is nothing. One of Sis’s best friends is 17 and with a 23 year old. And it’s not as od as it sounds. But still, I dunno. I ended up in a local sweathole with Emer and a bunch of my sister’s friends the night of the Ireland-Cameroon match and it got to the end of the nigt when the slow songs come on and the amateur gynaecology demonstrations begin. I don’t know how I end up in tese situations. Anyway, I asked Catherine to dance in a kind of only-cos-we’re-both-stood-here-like-spas way. So we danced. Lah-dee-dah. Then the music stopped. No, it actually stopped. And we kinda……lingered. And if I was a more impulsive kinda bloke then maybe I would have……only I didn’t.

Catherne stayed over in our house that night. She does tha a lot, so much she has a toothbrush here. And yet I’ve never thought of er n the kind of sistery way one thinks of a sister’s friend. Catherine’s always felt more like….my equal. And I’m sure somethig else will happen and it’ll be far more entertaining than this twaddle.

What’s a little more entertaining is what happened while I was writing a draft of this the other night. I was closing all the windows on the computer and my sister was sitting down at the desk in front of it when she saw a window opened with an email I was typing to my cousin. In the few seconds it was on the screen before I closed it, she said “Oh, what are you writing to Carol about??” I told her, and moved to close the next window. Only the omputer froze for a few seconds. And guess what was stuck on the screen?

Now she hasn’t said a thing about it. But I’m finding it hard to take this as proof she never saw what I’d written before I frantically covered the screen with my arms. I’m still not sure if domestics would ensue if she saw it. It’s really weird. Imagine if Catherine liked me too. And we….like….became an item. Because it is possible, it’s very possible. And people around us have mentioned “chemistry”. But still. 17 going on 18? I dunno. I was walking another sister-friend home up the estate with Catherine the other night and the two of us walked back to my house alone. And it was……strange. Like “that” feeling.

No point getting to torn up about it though, I mean before this I thought I was quite mature regarding the whole liking someone business. And I haven’t gone on the way I used to go on in this diary about this fantastically gorgeous girl I saw the other day in quite a while. For example, I could think of a entire entry I could write about this one fantastically gorgeous amazing girl I met not so long ago. But I won’t.

Do the right thing will return after the break

Welcome back. In other news, Emer and I are still friends. I’m not as attached/attracted to her as I thought I’d be, but sure that’s life. Besides, she’s got a boyfriend. Still, she’s like a thin Kelly Osbourne and Kelly Osbourne is Joe’s nominee for Woman of the Year. Nice lips. Sorry, that was terribly rude of me. saw Traffic again with her, still an amazing film. So something nice out of it anyway! Emer’s nice, but I’m terribly out of synch with her or something. W hav anti-chemistry. Not like in a throw-stuff-across-the-room way (which might’ve been nice), but in a kind of not-getting-each-others-jokes way. But we might get better at being friends. She thinks Catherine fancies me……..

*raises eyebrow*

j

p.s. if you can get mp3s, get The Strokes Vs Christina Aguilera “A Stroke of Genie-us” bootleg. And Kylie Minogue’s “Can’t Get Blue Monday Out Of My Head”. And Rhianna “Oh Baby”, which rung around my head like no song has in a while over the May Bank Holiday weekend. And Jack L’s version of “Can’t Get You Out Of My Head”. Ah feck, just take my hard drive……….

p.p.s. but do get the Strokes bootleg