Things that mean so much

Tonight I was talking to the girl, the one the is friends with Ethan, but caused some trouble… Im going to put a name to her, her real name, only because Ethan is the only one Im not using the real name for. Laura, recently had her heart broken by her boyfriend. We were talking tonight about it and got around to Ethan. Im not really sure how far to trust her words considering our past history in our friendship. But she says she’s really happy for us, and that she thinks we are good for each other. She commented on how much he loves me. Another friend of his and mine, commented on that also, that he loves me.

Its very odd when I hear this when Im not actually out fishing for it. I used to have to really dig to find out what Byron felt about me. Ethan does or says somethings that absolutely make me fall in love with him all over again. Nearly on a daily basis. Like last night I was up waiting for him to get home from work, Im not really sure if we agree’d if he would come online and let me know he was home yet or not, but I was thinking we had, so I was waiting for him. While I waited Byron’s girlfriend Jaki, the one we broke up over, came online and we got to talking, I started bragging on Ethan. Though I was saying I wouldnt give up anything he does for me to get suprises. Suddenly mid brag I get an ICQ from him, he had snuck online, past my special sound I have for him when he comes onto ICQ. Too say the least he suprised me rather unexpectedly. I didnt think he’d be home that early, I expected him another hour or more later.

Twice today I was told Ethan and I are good for each other. This makes me incredibly happy. I know so many people do not approve of us, but its nice that those who really do know us see that we fit together. Its also nice that I dont feel like Im depending on him. That I actually love him, for him not for the need to be loved. As Im starting to learn that might have been why I loved Byron.

I so deeply wish there was a way I could show Ethan how much I love him. Instead I leave with this song..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If I could grant you one wish
I wish you could see the way you kiss,
Ooo I love watching you baby,
When your driving me crazy,

Ooo I love the way you, love the way you love me
There’s nowhere else I’d rather be
Ooo to feel the way I feel
with your arms around me
I only wish you could see
See the way you love me
Woah the way you love me

Its not right
its not fair
what your missing over there
Someday I’ll find a way to show you
just how lucking I am to know you

Your the million reasons why
there’s love reflecting in my eyes

The Way You Love Me – Faith Hill

hey, we both love boys named Ethan. Cool

And here’s the question… If Ethan looks in your eyes and sees how much you love him, if he kisses you, and feel your soul loving him, then why do you need to SHOW him how much you love him?

(HUGGLES)

This is MendedSoul starting a new incarnation – my old diary just got too unwieldy… (huggles)