Dear Mister Mayor

We virgins swear to Jesus
these trollops, tramps and teases
are giving us a racy reputation.

The tightness of their pants
and permission in their glance
invite the fairer sex’s degradation.

The bumping and the grinding,
the stop-or-you’ll-go-blinding,
included in their free-of-charge flirtation

are everywhere, we’re finding,
as if they’re redefining
the ins and outs of human copulation.

In response to this attack,
we would like to take a whack
at coming up with stiffer legislation;

you should lay them boot to collar
down the street and charge a dollar
for a ride to work on pubic transportation.

(If offended, please don’t mind us;
you can always come and find us
writing poems to vent our sexual frustration.)

Because I post here, I don’t really have anything to post here. I might try someday anyway. . I don’t accept notes, but that doesn’t mean you can’t comment.