yeah

Fuck.

*smiles weakly*

I’ll go on the record as saying i miss you

I have nothing to complain about. But it hurts, physically. I can feel it, in my chest, a small knot pulling tighter and tighter. I almost wish it would snap, maybe then the pressure would ease up.

I couldn’t eat lunch, at the Sheraton with my family when my plane was delayed. The food made the stomach-clenching panic start again. I was reminded of what I was going back to, of the constant tension and the inability to relax and the everpresent anxiety.

The leaving almost makes the seeing not worth it.

Almost.