3/30/08

i am so sick of being your last priority. your last thought if i’m thought of at all.
i;m sick of crying over your shit. i’m sick of doing all your shit, reminding you to do your shit. i feel like your mother. how did it get like this?
i am sick of listening ot excuse after excuse…..
you arent even listening to what i want at all. its all about you and what you want and what everyone else will think
that’s how i grew up. i grew up putting on  a show. life was a big show. nobody could ever see a break or a crack or anything less than a smile. i am done putting the show on. and i am sick of you doing it. i am sick of it.
i am sick of waiting for you
all i do is wait for you.
my life is flashing before me. its dissipating and its like you don’t care.
i am tired of waiting for you.
waiting for you to get a job
waiting for you to do the laundry
to call
to come home
to answer the phone
to call unemployment
to get off your ass
to buy a ring
to plan a wedding
sick of waiting for you to do all these things.
what do i want? how do i get it?
are you fitting into this plan anymore?