thoughts again

I didn’t have much me time again today… I wonder why? Maybe it was because I had to work 8-3 today and The kids wanted to go swimming afterwards. Kind of stinks… I wish holidays were basically the same … Just didn’t really matter… The neighbor has 5 of her grandchildren and her 17 yr old son visiting for this holiday… First I’ve met them… The other neighbor and them and us went swimming… I think they might have thought I was being rude… I don’t know… I wish I didn’t have to do much anymore… I wonder really… Why do I care? I wish I could live in this place with the only kids in like 5 mile radius… I don’t think that could ever happen. But If I had Jimmy with me it would be a little different. He doesn’t let me feel like I don’t belong. He makes people treat me like He think’s I should be. He won’t let anyone ignore me if I don’t want to be. And if kids are playing and I feel mine are being left out, He finds something fun that all of them can do.

He complains about the picnics he has to go to with the “co-workers” but he likes it when they have to bring their kids. He loves children. He wants tons and tons of them. This is the man who told me I need like 13 or more children. Plus mine. What ever. We’ll figure that out if this thing works out…

I still can’t believe I’m nervous. I mean more then when I got married. Guess that means I really do love him. Butterflies won’t stop flying in my stomach….Ahh! 5 weeks and 6 days to go!

Someone told me that it’s better to get it all out now so I’m good when it comes to the actual date… We’ll see.

On another note… Those kids are driving me crazy! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH