Never quite started

this is sort of my first post here, because although I joined up many years ago, I never actually posted anything in this blog.

Used to believe in a lot of things but now things have changed.   But I feel more at peace with myself . Maybe I’m just older and more tired.

a lot of weight has to come off this year. ThatS a goal I set for myself .   Beginning to get plantar fasciitis.   Even though I walk a great deal in the course of my work,  it is not helping .

ive been thinking of death a lot more now.   Perhaps it’s becos my younger Brother, all of 45, died suddenly in hospital last year .

he lived with Cerebral Palsy all his life and his legs getting weaker, eyes going blind with RP, his mood swings were getting worse and between my dad and domestic worker ( I’m told this is the politically correct word now,  not helper), they were at wits end trying to manage.

Three years ago my 14 year old Maltese guy died as well.   Even though I was not particularly attached to him,  I was very sad nontheless.

Then there were other things. Small seemingly insignificant encounters that make me feel how temporary life is.