and that was Friday

I drove over to my friend’s house yesterday afternoon, after going to DEQ to get my car’s clean air certificate, having found that, "because of The Sequestration", Department of Environmental Quality was closed Friday on a "Furlough Day".

Well. I knew this would happen – short notice about rides needed or things to be picked up, so yesterday it was a shower stool, something to sit on in the bathtub/shower. So many miles down there to pick up the cash, and so many miles back this way, in developing Friday Rush Hour traffic, aaaaannndddd so many miles back and forth again, because the shower stool was wrong, my friend said.

Well, it’s a lesson in Patience, I choose to see it as, so, ok. Thank god for psyche meds.

Then, his son had his girlfriend up from Eugene or down from Seattle; I don’t remember which, want to go to a concert up in Portland, and they plan to be gone for several hours.

"You’re going to be around, aren’t you, Cat?" The assumption of course, why yes I’m going to stick around for an unknown number of hours, listening to my friend’s abrasive critics and heated discussion of how he feels and blah blah blah- you know, "being there for him".

I was hungry, and the meds wear off noticeably, and I had a $6 Papa Murphy’s Tax Day Special in the fridge at home. I did hang out for some hours that first time; my friend was up and wearing his back brace and all active, but noisy about how it hurt to move, me hovering nearby "just in case". The "kids" leave, another friend having driven up from where ever to join them, the plan being that they’d go down to the Transit Center, there in Oregon City, and take Trimet, the bus up to Portland.

So, I’m thinking, The bus adds an hour each way on that trip from OC to Portland, and the concert they wanna see is so many hours, to get in, see the concert and to get out, not to mention, there’s the hey, we’re in Downtown Portland, let’s do something factor.

We’re talking a LONG TIME here.

Well, it’s not like I didn’t know it was coming.

So. He’s like, totally active, moving here and there and reaching for stuff and complaining about how his son doesn’t do anything right, that he always has been that way, that he’s got ADHD, and blah blah blah. Fun for the cat. I have a very simple life for a reason. I’ve also got that pizza waiting to bake, and I like my quiet little home, I stand by for so many hours, then I go home to bake the pizza. My friend finally tires out and gets back into his hospital bed, and that’s a whole production in itself, so, six hours after "being there", I motored home, careful to note the time, and giving myself two hours to go back, cuz the kid’s gonna still be gone, and I shouldn’t leave my friend alone so long.

I’m all, responsible and concerned, being a good friend, blah blah blah.

I start back, get part way, and realise I had forgotten my wallet, picking up a different jacket than the one I prepped for going back to Oregon City. I’m about out the door, with the wallet, and a call to pick up a half gallon of milk on my way, and another call from the ex, his ex, a how’s he doing and did he get my card and what’d he say, and I don’t have time, I’m over my self-set two hours, and I cut that shorter than she wants, and go back to OC to find:

My friend, up out of bed again, doing this and doing that around his house, no back brace on, moaning and groaning the whole time.

People are gonna do what they want to do. Screws up all the plans The kids are still not back, even though it was getting past 12:30. I’ve been keeping more "normal" hours lately, and it’s getting late for me, the meds are winding down again, and that’s even with an extra Adderall out of my dwindling, heavily regulated, Limited supply.

The drawback of being on meds – you come to need them

My most deteminibly Independent friend is gonna do what he wants to do, pretty much no matter what, and if no one’s around, and he feels like he’s gettin’ away with it, you know he’s gonna try.

I spend a little more time there, and the kid calls ME, not his dad, to say the concert just got out, they’ll be back at 2.  An hour and a half from then.  I relay the message, hear all about it, and leave by 1.  It’s been a long day, and I feel like I still have things to do at home, and, DEQ is open Saturday – later Today, since it’s close to 1:30 by the time I get home.

So, lessons learned.  I was totally right, this’ll be hard, looking after my friend, but I was maybe wrong on how long it would take him to recover.  Unless he hurts himself by doing too much too soon.

I’ll hear about that too, if that bridge comes.

***

Anyway, I got things to do and tags to get for my car, so I’m outa here.

Thanks for stopping by.

 

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