Have to begin Some where…
There are many titles that are running through my head right now I just cant pick one.
- Need to try something new.
- Something has to give.
- I need to share my story but want to remain Anonymous at this point.
- Thoughts and feelings coursing through my head and body.
- Just needing an outlet for everything with no one to tell me thats wrong, or pity me in any way.
- Maybe to not feel so alone, or unimportant.
- Some kind of normalcy, when everything is so chaotic.
I could go on and on. I have been thinking this for about doing something like this for a while. A blog or something to get all this out and maybe help someone else because I know I can’t be the only one who is feeling this or going through what I am. I tend to be questioning everything in my life right now and its just to much. Leads to panic attacks or the depression comes rushing in to the overwhelming sadness that takes over. Because as a person we all want to be heard and seen, to be valued and loved. I dunno at this particular moment in my life I am asking myself more and more why do I even bother and why am I still here. Why am I still fighting, what am I really fighting for? I haven’t had the hardest life but I haven’t had the easiest either. But I have learned over the years that the past doesn’t not define who we are and what we are worth. I am just struggling on where do I fit in anymore? Next post or entry maybe I will start off telling more about myself so people can understand a bit better. Cause this one is all over the map. I dunno maybe this will help me come to more of a clearer understanding of who or what or purpose there is for me. Because right now I have no clue and I feel like I am slowly dying inside and I am finding it to hard to breath my next breathe. I dunno how much or how many entries I am going to do it may be 1 a day to 30. All I do know is I need something, I just can’t for the life of me figure out what it is right now.
Thanks for reading. I truly hope everyone has a great day or at the very least a better day then yesterday.