theres nothing left but faith.

last week i was reading someone’s diary and i really loved it. but i was at rolf’s, so i didnt have much time. i left a note, saying i’d be back. and now i lost the diary. grrr. i have no idea who it was. that makes me sad.

i’m at home. sick. my throat is annoying me, i have a weird headache [just lost my interest in life, i think] and i cough. which is all in all annoying, but probably not enough to stay home. i’m going to the doctor’s tonight. i dont like that. i dont like my doctor and he’s probably going to ask me if i have psychological problems, since i’m not really sick. why cant he just write a note to let me stay home for a week or so.

i miss old friends.

i don’t feel like writing [the old-fashioned writing, with pen + paper], which is a shame, because i should. people are waiting for me to reply. i don’t feel like i have anything to say. i’m not that special. and, for once, i’m too tired to think. i dont want to think about drama or intense living. i just want a peaceful day. i feel guilty about that.

i’m still excited about living with rolf. i’m sure it’ll be scary, but it’s gonna do me good, i think.
if everything works out fine and i can go live there, school is pretty useless. then it doesnt really matter if i’m at school today. or if finish some project. or if i give a doctor’s note for my abscence.

being unresponsible is so attractive.