Sweet Home Chicago

Wanna know something depressing? Watching the thermostat in your car go from 78 degrees to 25 degrees in a period of 24 hours. “When did you get a thermostat in your car?” you ask? Good question- hysterical answer.

Rob, the father of my sister’s baby, the man I have no less than loathed the past two years, the only man I can actually say I truly “hate”, lent me his 2004 Acura: leather heated seats, sun roof, 6 disc changer, and every other cool feature that could come in a four door bucket of metal meant to get you from point A to point B. How did that come about? Interesting story.

 The day before we left, I was getting everything set on my mom’s car- oil change, tire rotation, transmission checked. Turns out when you drive about 65 miles per hour, the whole thing shakes so bad, you could turn half and half into butter. Turns out a rim on the one tire was pretty bad- you could drive on it, but in the words of the mechanic, “You’ll be too aggrevated by the time you get the Indianapolis, you’ll turn around.” Depressed, the money for the trip slowly depleting, Rob comes down stairs. “I don’t have the money right now to lend you to fix the rim, but, you can take my car if you want. Brand new, it runs perfectly.” I was floored- he KNOWS I hate him, and he would lend me his car? It made me do a lot of soul searching. Having started to go back to church, I have started to realize I can not hold a grudge forever, I need to forgive. And, I know that I can’t hate anyone, but that doesn’t stop me from despizing him. I will try to keep an open mind. But, back to the trip. Lots of sun and fun, I am now a shade darker than “Irish”. And of course, Mike and I now have about 30 new inside jokes, and just like last year’s trip, I must document them:

 – “Hi, we need an ashtray and a room service menu.” (30 minutes pass) Here’s your ashtray, be back with the menu. (30 minutes pass) Damn slow ass New Orelaners.

 – “Someone drove our car around! Damn Valet parking.” (Bitch on the phone: ‘I have no need, desire, nor want to drive your vehicle.’)Oh, wait, trip mileage resets at 1000… opppppsssyyyyy.

– Fart smelling diet coke.

– “This moon pie is crumby- it dries out your mouth, I CAN NOT BREATHE!”

– “You know you wanted to see Squaw Valley” “Yes, that was the entire point of my trip down here… SQUAW!!”

– Let’s go to Miami! Oh wait, a tanker exploded, and it took us two hours to drive 10 miles. Booooo.

– Total DILF.

– ::clear throat:: ::giggle:: :clear throat: ::LAUGH::

– Laughing so much we cried, and for no apparent reason at all. – Slow- mo laughing into the back seat.

– ::noticing cigarette burn in car:: Yeah, we are going to die. ::after the cat peed in Rob’s car:: Mike, I am going to miss you, we are dead.

– ::doing something stupid:: “How’d that go again?” “Sorry, it was a one time deal.” (five seconds pass) ::doing same stupid something::

I swear there were lots more, but it’s been a long trip, and I still haven’t slept a full amount since I’ve been back. I am tired, and I start school tomorrow… boooooo. I am goin to try and update more often. I’ll do my best. 🙂 Hope all are well, later kiddies!!