1650 updatable

Saucy Scale: 10

It’s just before 7:00 am.  I’ve got a very awake Mattson squirming around on the Boppy on my lap.  I’m trying to type over him.  He’s very smiley & it’s a bit distracting (but a wonderful distraction).

Needless to say, I’m not expecting much from this entry.

I can’t believe that our baby is already at the  8 week mark.  In so many ways it feels like we just got home from the hospital (minus the surgery & recovery).

Gus wasn’t too sure about the about bringing Mattson home with us at first.  Which made our days very difficult for awhile.  Especially after our Familial Help (aka TBU’s mom) went back home to Iowa.  There were times I was pretty overwhelmed by everything.  Overwhelmed & scared about the future.

And I missed my own mommy incredibly.  Post-partum or in mourning…I spent a lot of time crying.

But somewhere in there, things got better.  I’m not even sure when it happened, but we’re good now.

TBU asked to go out of town for a weekend.  I was scared to death to be "alone" with the boys for that length of time (for the first time).  It wasn’t a fear of caring for the boys, it was more a fear of breaking up the time to keep my sanity.  I know that after being with the boys all day long, I get very antsy for TBU to get home just so that I can get a break from them.  Know what I mean?  So I told TBU to go on his weekend trip & I arranged to hang out with my brother and my daddy to help me break up the time a bit.  Afterwards, I was surprised that the weekend was much easier on me than I’d expected.  It sort of helped me gain some confidence about my mom skills, I guess.

Seems like things got better for us after that weekend.

Like I said, Gus wasn’t too keen on sharing his kingdom with the new baby.  But now, he’s in love with his baby brother.  & tries to love him…too death.  He gets right in Mattson’s face, has no problem laying on top of him. or trying to jam the bubba (pacifier) down his throat (literally) if Mattson cries.

Instead of just calling him "baby" – which isn’t too clear when also refers to Baby (the dog) & Baby (Gus) as well as the new one), he now understands that The New One has a name.  For now, Gus calls him Matt (which is logical, but not my personal favorite alternate reference).

We’ve narrowed down all versions of "baby" by getting him to clariy if he means:

• Gus
• Matt or
• Boo Boo  (the dog)

The only time Gus seems at all jealous is when Mattson his having nummies (nursing).  Since Mattson is still little, he has nummies pretty much all the time when he’s awake.  Gus took this opportunity to learn a new word… "turn".  As in: "Gus turn?"  or shortened to "Turn?"  Which translates easily into "Gus wants some nummies mommy!"

So there you have it…my dirty little secret.  I’m nursing 2 babies right now.  Gus gets a turn first thing in the morning and after his afternoon nap.  (Speaking of napping,,,I seriously miss those decadent marathon naps that Gus & I took together when I was pregnant.)

Mattson is a wonderful baby.  He nurses & sleeps well (albeit not sleeping through the night yet).  He’s very smiley & happy.  He has a small "stork bite" on the back of his neck.  It was shocking to realize that it is pretty much identical to the one my mommy had on the back of her neck.  My brother has a very elaborate tale – he had an "impression" of  our mommy handing over Mattson to us at his birth.  I like to think she gave Mattson a kiss on that spot before handing him over to us.  Sometimes it makes me cry.  I like to kiss that spot & I think of her.

Now that the weather has gotten better, I’ve been taking the boys outside more often.  (Which is good, b/c walking the indoor mall was getting really old.)  We walk around Downtown Our Town which has a lovely riverfront walkway.  We can feed the ducks (Gus does obsess about those ducks) and just walk through the gardens & parks.  We’ve also been going to Story Time at the local library a few times a week.

I’ve reconnected with a few local mommy friends.  Actually, they were just old friends and then they became mommies (before I did).  Both knew my mommy, so it’s nice to have that kind of history with them as well as relating to them as moms.

Wow, I’ve been at this entry for awhile.  I never expected my kids to let me get this far.  The one on my lap has nursed himself to sleep and the one in his room is still sleeping.  Odd.

Over the past few weeks – when I couldn’t find the time of freedom to post anytthing – something funny would happen or a milestone would be reached and I’d long to write about it.  Now that I’m here, it all escapes me  That’s my addled sleep-deprived brain at work.

Oops!  Gus is awake and none-too-pleased.  Time to cheer him up and changed some diapers if we want to get this day off to a good start!

Here’s the 5 things that make me happy:

1. Gus
2. Mattson
3. Getting into a groove together
4. Time with daddy – especially weekends
5. Life is good