Analingus.

I realized in Metaphysics today that I’ve never fully explained Tracy. It’s okay if the name doesn’t mean much to you. I know she comes up a lot in conversation between me and Cliff, and she generally comes to mind anytime the anus is mentioned, though I’m not sure if I’ve ever mentioned her on OD before. Tracy in a nutshell:

Tracy likes it when guys lick her anus

If your reaction is, ” Excuse me?” then your reaction is pretty close to what mine was. I’ve never personally met this girl, but um. One of the querky people Cliff has met. We’ve talked about her a lot for a girl I’ve never met before.

Initially, I probably had that, “I’d never lick a girl’s anus” reaction. I mean, it’s her butthole. Shit comes out of there! And the general adversive reactions to someone else’s back door. Thing is, I’m very anally inclined. I don’t mean girl’s anuses. My own anus. I began touching my anus while masturbating YEARS ago, maybe when I was 14. I’ve since moved on to full prostate-massages with a butt plug. But I mention this to show how touching my own anus doesn’t bother me much.

So I eventually thought about marrying a girl. And one day she says to me, “Timmy, it would make me REALLY REALLY REALLY happy if you licked my anus.” Now, let’s assume everything else is realistically perfect. We shower together, and I make sure that butthole of hers is squeaky-clean. Well. Um. Why the hell not? It may be slightly different skin than the rest of the body, but it’s still just skin. It’s just another part of her, where excrement comes out of every now and then. You don’t kiss a girl after she vomits, do you? Exactly.

So yeah. I’ll lick ass, under the right circumstances. I’ve reached a tolerance of the concept as such that I’d even penetrate a girl’s anus with my tongue. Well, maybe. It’s all theory, you know.

As for Tracy, it’s clearly a domination thing. “Kissing ass” is a very submissive thing. So taking it another step, actually kissing one’s anus is an even more submissive act. *nods* Tracy likes it when a guy’s tongue is slithering in her butthole. She actually had an ex-boyfriend who did it and liked it. Guess what happened. Yeah, she got bored with him. How typical.

Um. I’m not sure what else to say. All Cliff and I have to do is say “Tracy”, and we both smile at each other. I think it’s comforting to know there’s somebody a little more fucked up than we are. “Well, at least I don’t need somebody to lick my ass.”

A simple hug would do, for me. But hey, maybe I’m the weird one.