Let’s Talk About Iraq.

I have a simple question:

Do you believe the Iraqi people should assert their freedom?

Think carefully, young squire. If you disagree, you’re a terrorist. You don’t like freedom.

If you agree? You’re also a terrorist. You are part of the remaining Baath party dissident opposing American occupation.

Okay, okay, I’m just trying to be funny. But, think about it. What makes the Baath party any less Iraqi than the rest of Iraq?

Oh hell, it’s really pointless to try and make sense of the anarchy in Iraq right now. Any of the valid, and even invalid, reasons they had for bombing the shit out of Iraq don’t hold any weight anymore. Let’s see what lies I can think of off the top of my head.

• They have WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION! OH MY GOD!! THEY COULD SEND LIKE ONE MISSILE AND KILL SOME COWS IN MONTANA!
  First off, the Dubya Administration has totally perverted the term “Weapons of Mass Destruction”. NOt too long ago, that meant exclusively nuclear weapons. Which are, really, the only weapons capable of true MASS DESTRUCTION. How the hell can you throw mustard powder in the same class as a nuclear reaction?

  Of course, there’s a purpose to perverting the language. By being as nonspecific as possible, they could probably find classify a machine-gun as a “weapon of mass destruction”. (Just think, back in the day, they thought wars would end because of weapons so “horrible” as the machine-gun.) What HAVE they found? I remember hearing something about empty shells. Oh, great find. That’s like saying someone has a whole shitload of bread and only finding one stale crumb that wouldn’t be worth eating even if it were fresh.

  Fact is, the Dubya Administration has blatantly lied to the American people, on a very serious matter. Does it matter if Clinton got a BJ from an intern? Not really. Does it matter if you have evidence to back up your reasons for war? WAR. War isn’t a card game. War is hell, and the Dubya Administration should be ashamed of itself for deluding noble young Americans into thinking they’re fighting for a just cause. And then cutting benefits for veterans. What the fuck?

• They’re a threat to their neighbors!
  The highly-regarded Republican Guard didn’t put up much of a fight. Probably because the US took the cowardly way out and went forth with operation “Bomb Their Ass and Steal Their Gas.” Forget about how many Iraqis have died. The astoundingly low number of American casualties is proof that Iraq was never a threat to anybody but themselves. Of course, the Dubya Administration would take the low American casualty number as a good thing. And rightfully so, in a way. Less death is good, right? It shows how efficient the kills-per-soldier rate is. And with less deaths, there’s more people for the occupation force.
• Saddam is a bad man! Very bad! We should kill all the bad people in the world.
  No shit Saddam is bad. But, there’s also a lot of other wackos out there. Should the US go out there and kill all the “bad” people. Ask yourself one simple question: Who decides what’s good and bad?

  Okay, so we seem to have kicked Saddam out of his royal palace. But, where is he? Instead of a man-on-man raid to actually capture him and assrape him, we bombed the shit out of him. Saddam’s wang must be huge. As George Carlin said, “They have bigger penises than us? Throw bombs on them!”

• We must liberate the Iraqi people so they can be FREEEEE.
  Another question: Are the Iraqi people better off now than they were when they had Saddam around? Aside from the American Occupation force, it’s pretty much anarchy there. Well, they have their freedom now. If you think about it, you have to give up a little bit of freedom to even have a government. Er, random thought. Anyway, if the point of Gulf War Two was to kick out Saddam and free the Iraq people, then the American Occupation Force should leave, ASAP.

I’d like to state that I’m writing this many hours after the previous text. My power went out. And smart me was writing in notepad. Behold, the power of notepad. What was I going to say… Something about how… Actually, I can’t remember. Maybe if I reread all that, it would come back to me. But, I have a hard time rereading my own stuff. It really amazes me how other people can read it.