Morality and Me Redux.

Status Report

Wearing: One of Wendi’s old Alice in Chains shirts

WinAmp is playing: Big Long Now – Nirvana

Last ate: Some chicken stuff, some rice, and some veggies.

Last round of masturbation: Two nights ago.

Entry Start Time: 4:10 AM Uh, I have no idea, I forgot to put that in when I started the entry.

Based on Esther’s “Senses”.

Morals. I’ve pondered this, and I think I’ve thought enough to write an entry. As your stereotypical philosopher would say, “What are morals?” Morals are a human invention, despite what religion will tell you. Off the top of my head, morals are guidelines to live by. Rules. Things you’re not supposed to do. One is “moral” when one stays inside these guidelines, whatever they may be.

Morality comes down to what you consider “good” and “bad”. Personally, I do not see the world in black and white. I see the world in gray, with some things being “better” than others, and other things being “worse” than others. But as I pondered this last night in preparation, one word crossed my mind: Consequences.

Why do I not kill people that piss me off? As much as I’d like to say that I’d feel bad for ending that person’s life, let’s be honest. When you REALLY want to kill someone, you aren’t thinking about how that person will feel, how their family will feel, such and such. Get in the mind of a killer. So. Why do I not kill? The cops. This isn’t all that high on Maslow’s Hierarchy (as I believe it’s called), but it’s the truth.

Why am I not violent? I can give rhetoric about how it’s bad to be violent, but that’s all it is: rhetoric. I did a paper on Ghandi. He was admirable, but a little nuts. Why is violence bad? It’s just physics. Why can I hit a brick wall, but not a human? It’s just forces. You don’t hear people talking about brick rights. Uh. Okay, I’m being silly. If I hit someone, there are consequences to that action. For example, that person can hit me back. Once you don’t mind being hit back, you can hit people all you want. It’s as simple as that.

I will continue to be a non-violent person. Why? Because it’s to my advantage. By not being violent, I will not get the crap beaten out of me. I will not be seen as an aggressive male. I try not to be shy anymore, because it’s to my advantage to be out there and talkative. I’m sure that, at one time, it was to my advantage to be shy. I masturbate a lot because it feels good. It cleans out my prostate. Wants and desires. Advantagous consequences. We choose what we will eat next based on what we think will taste best at the time. Or, if not at that time, at a later time. (You know, eating something really great five days in a row, then eating something average on the sixth day so on the seventh, you’ll love that great food again. It’s the same principal that dictates that I should skip a day of masturbating so the day after will bring me a better orgasm.)

I have done absolutely no research on this, but it makes me wonder about serial killers. What drives them over the edge? My guess is when you just don’t care about the consequences.

And so let’s turn back to me. The longer I live, the more I can say, “Wow, nothing really matters.” As some of you know, I have absolutely no problem flashing people with TimmyPorn. I used to wonder how people could do porn, but now I understand, if only a little bit. I don’t care if people see me naked. The desire to hide and cloth oneself is entirely a human desire. Some desires we must purge. Other desires, we should indulge. If it weren’t for the fear of Bang Bang Bruce suddenly deciding to do his job, I would flash all of Open Diary. It wouldn’t bother me one bit. (Oh, I have a new digital camera.) Consequences, consequences.

I reiterate: When you realize that nothing matters, you’re pretty free to do what you want. To rephrase, when you don’t mind the consequences of your actions, you can do whatever you want. What can I do? Whatever I want. What shall I decide NOT to do? Again, whatever I want. Just because I can do something doesn’t mean I must do that thing. And just because I shouldn’t do something doesn’t mean I can’t go ahead and do it anyway.

I consider myself a pretty good person. Maybe even a little moral. Sexually deviant, but that’s about it. Even that’s pretty weak. As much as I’d love to claim that I’m easy, I’m not. I’m a virgin!

I could go on down the line of individual things, asking myself whether they’re “moral” or not, but that seems pointless. It’s up to each one of us to decide what things are “good” and what things are “bad”. There is no set guideline. And we shouldn’t assume our morality scheme is the same as the next person. It’s very possible that what’s “good” for us is “bad” for another person.

To tangent, have you ever considered what is meant by the word “natural”? Natural means “from nature”, I believe. Or having to do with nature. Original? Unaltered? When does something because unnatural? Let’s say we have some “natural” spring water. What happens if we add some sugar to it? Is it natural sugar spring water? Or is it sugar natural spring water? Have you ever noticed how manufactured all your food is? Do this: Walk around your house and point out everything that was manufactured by a company, whether large or small. Everything. We are consumers. Gallons of milk. Boxes of cereal. Vats of cheese balls. No doubt cheese balls are not that natural. But, I eat it anyway. And yet. Why ARE cheese balls unnatural? What if you create a cheese ball that is made entirely from things found in ‘nature’. Could you then call it an “all-natural cheese ball”?

For someone that preaches moderation, I sure am excessive. (Just felt like sharing that.)

Oh, and the redux in the title refers to what I wrote in my third entry. I haven’t read it in a while. I forget what I wrote. I’m sure my writing style has.. changed. Mutated. I like what Kelly said in a note: “So .. be good not for the sake of religion but for the sake of being able to look at yourself in the morning? Have you read much Benjamin Franklin? This sounds a lot like him.” Being able to respect myself is a big catalyst for why I do not do certain things. And why I can let myself do certain things.

Life is arbitrary.